If you want to know how to tell if a girl likes you at work, then I’ll help you out.
Below, I’ll show you all the main signs that a female coworker may be interested in you and tell you what to do about it. I’ll also go over some of the mistakes that you should avoid if you don’t want to get in trouble with HR for sexual harassment or if you don’t want to make a fool of yourself.
Now, let’s get to it!
How to tell if a girl likes you at work
Your workplace may have excellent opportunities to meet someone awesome and then start dating them.
However, for a lot of guys, it can be difficult to tell if a female coworker is interested in them in a romantic way. If you misinterpret certain signs of professional courtesy or friendliness and take them the wrong way, you may get into a lot of trouble with your boss or HR. In some severe cases, this may even cause you to lose your job and your reputation.
No one wants to be known as “That Guy” — someone who is written up for sexual harassment and who every woman now avoids like the plague. That’s why it’s important to learn how to tell if a girl likes you at work, in order to avoid potential disaster.
Since people in the workplace are trying to maintain professionalism and be courteous to one another, you need to figure out the following:
- Is the girl just being friendly or is she actually interested in you romantically?
This is a critical point when learning how to tell if a girl likes you at work. Because some women are going to be friendly with you without it meaning anything more than that. It’s important you learn how to distinguish flirting from friendliness.
The main signs that a female coworker likes you
Some of these may be a bit more subtle than others, but if you notice your coworker show several of these signs, it means that she’s interested in you.
She finds many excuses to be near you
When someone likes you in a more-than-friendly manner, they usually want to spend as much time near you as possible. So, notice if any of your female coworkers hang out near you too often for it to be a coincidence.
For example, if you see a girl at your work who often finds excuses to walk by where you usually are and looks at you with a smile or holds eye contact, then she’s likely interested in you. If you see that she hangs out in the same room as you far too often, even though she shouldn’t be there and her station is somewhere else, it’s a huge sign that she likes you.
Keep your eyes open and notice which of your female coworkers hang around you too often without much reason. Then, chat them up.
She “lights up” whenever she sees you
This is huge! If you notice that a female coworker always brightens up and keeps smiling as soon as she sees you, then it means she likes you.
And I’m not talking about a plain and polite smile that shows common courtesy. I’m talking about a huge, radiant, warm, ear-to-ear grin, and an overall positive change in her vibe. When you see this, you should make eye contact and smile at her yourself and see how she reacts. If she looks away in a shy manner or holds your gaze intensely, it means she likes you. As long as she doesn’t look cold and indifferent, then you should talk to her if you think she’s cute.
She talks with you much more often than others
This is another significant sign of how to tell if a girl likes you at work because it shows clear interest.
It’s rare for people to go out of their way to talk to someone as often as possible. If you notice that a girl at your work does that to you, it means she’s interested in you. This is especially true if the both of you talk often about non-work related stuff and if she keeps asking you personal questions. If she regularly asks you about your day, or what you were up to outside of work, it will mean that she’s there for a social visit and wants to get to know you better.
Also, if she often walks up to you and asks you about random and seemingly pointless stuff for which she could easily find an answer elsewhere, then that’s an even better sign. She could have easily used a search engine to find her answers or ask anyone else in your workplace. However, she obviously wants to use any excuse to talk to you and be near you, which means that you’ve piqued her interest.
Finally, if she’s always more excited and talkative with YOU as opposed to everyone else in your office, then the chances are enormous that she finds you very attractive.
Don’t miss this opportunity to see if she’d be interested in grabbing a cup of coffee with you after work and possibly continue the conversation somewhere more comfortable.
She finds excuses to touch you
This is, by far, the biggest sign that a female coworker is interested in you in an intimate way.
Honestly, it’s the ultimate sign of how to tell if a girl likes you at work, and anywhere else for that matter, so don’t miss it!
However, you should make sure that her touch is much more frequent than is normally considered formal or friendly and that she touches you in other ways than just shaking your hand. I’m talking about when she touches your arm, your shoulder or somewhere else where platonic friends don’t normally touch one another. Anything more than a formal handshake at work, if you aren’t already great friends, is considered too much. So, if she’s being more physical with you than usual and touches you often — she definitely likes you.
Physical touch is one of the most important things in attraction and seduction. No one is going to touch you more than is absolutely necessary if they don’t find you attractive.
Don’t miss your opportunity to ask her out if you notice she does this to you often.
She openly flirts with you
If you see this, then what are you waiting for; ask her out!
There’s not much to say here except that she VERY OBVIOUSLY likes you and finds you attractive or she wouldn’t be flirting with you so openly. Take it as a sure sign and see if she’d be interested in meeting with you after work.
I’m surprised I even have to mention this but trust me — we guys can be really dense sometimes when it comes to women and flirting . . .
Safe to say, when your female coworker flirts with you at work, then you should flirt with her as well. Tease her a little bit about being so open, but ultimately just ask her out.
She compliments you often
If you have a female coworker who frequently compliments you on your appearance, your character traits or your accomplishments, then she also finds you attractive.
If she’s frequently telling you things like “You’re always making me smile,” “You must work out often,” “You’re so handy,” or even something obvious as “You’re so handsome,” then she likes you. Essentially, if a girl at work tells you she likes spending time with you or that you give the best advice or that you’re manly, smell nice, and that she loves your voice — then make your move or miss out on a great opportunity.
Girls very rarely give compliments to guys they don’t like, so make sure to notice this if you want to take advantage of knowing how to tell if a girl likes you at work.
She often asks you to help her
As long as she’s not using you to do her work for her (which can often happen if you don’t have strong and healthy boundaries with other people) and frequently asks you to help her out, then she wants to spend time with you.
Again, when someone likes you, they’ll want to spend as much time with you or at least near you as possible. That’s why the perfect excuse at work for any girl who’d want to be near you would be to ask you to help her with her work stuff. So, if you notice that she calls for you often and asks for your advice, even if she’s not from your department and your job description is entirely different from hers, then she’s definitely interested.
See if you can schedule a more private “business meeting” with her, to sort all of that “work stuff” out, away from prying eyes.
Approaching women at work
Knowing how to tell if a girl likes you at work is great, but sometimes it’s not enough . . .
What if you don’t notice any signs, or if there aren’t many women in your workplace who have the opportunity to meet you while you’re working? Then, you’ll just have to approach someone you’re interested in yourself.
However, approaching women willy-nilly at work can cause a ton of potential problems and may get you in serious trouble if you do it the wrong way. You don’t want to be labeled as a “creep” or “weirdo” at work. That’s why approaching your female coworkers should be done differently than you’d approach a woman in a bar. In fact, many dating coaches will tell you that approaching women at work is one of the WORST things you can do.
Remember the age-old adage of “Don’t shit where you eat?” Well, it’s true for a very good reason! But don’t get discouraged because I’ll show you a great way to approach which works often.
Here’s what you can do to maximize your results and approach your female coworkers:
First, you pick a spot where you can regularly meet the girl you’re interested in. It can be anywhere: the lunchroom, the elevator, the office kitchen or coffee machine, etc. As long as you see her there often, it’ll work fine.
Second, you make sure to do it ON BREAK and not during active business hours. During active work hours, most people are busy and don’t have the time for a social chat. They may find it annoying because usually, their mind will be on something else.
Third, you notice something about that particular place where you see her often that she’d agree with you on. For example, if it’s in the office kitchen near the coffee machine, it’s easy to notice if the coffee is cheap, bland and worthless, or if it’s out of this world.
Another example is if you see her often in the elevator, you can notice that it’s very slow or that the music in it is silly or bad. You get the idea — notice something that she’d agree with.
Fourth, you say “Hey” to her when you see her there and wait for her to answer you. When she does, you then voice your observation about that thing you noticed which I mentioned above.
You then ask her matter-of-factly about how long she’s been working here. The whole thing can go something like this:
You: “Oh wow, this coffee is awful!”
Her: “Yeah . . .”
You: “So, how long you’ve been working here anyway?”
Then, she’ll tell you, and you simply reply with “Oh, that’s cool. Well, I’ve gotta run, but it would be great to catch up with you again for a much better cup of coffee or something.”
If she agrees, then just hand her your cell phone and ask her to put her number in.
And that’s it! This way works really well and often.
If you don’t know how to tell if a girl likes you at work or if you have no opportunity to notice any signs of interest from them, then this is the safest way to chat up a girl who is your coworker. It’s not creepy and threatening. It will never get you in trouble with HR for sexual harassment or for being inappropriate unless you really come off as a weirdo.
There are, of course, many other ways to chat up a girl at your work, but you shouldn’t need anything much more complicated than this example.
You don’t even have to say that you have to get going so soon. If you see that she’s eager to chat with you longer, then stay as long as you’re both enjoying each other’s company and THEN say that you’ve got to run.
Just make sure that you aren’t a whimpering mess when you talk to her. See to it that your body language, eye contact, tone of voice and similar things are in order and you’ll do fine.
Obviously, it’s much better if a girl at your work is already interested in you in the first place and gives you some signs that she likes you. Then it’s as easy as noticing those signs and taking advantage of the great opportunity that she presents you with to chat her up and get her number for later.
However, it’s not always easy to see these signs and understand intuitively how to tell if a girl likes you at work, so you may need to take matters into your own hands and approach her yourself.
Just don’t approach every woman at your workplace, or soon the whole office will know this as your coworkers will start gossiping. Avoid this massive mistake and you’ll save yourself a lot of frustration and possibly even shame.