With nearly 2.1 million residents, there’s always someone in Johannesburg angling for a quickie. We assure you, Johannesburg hookups are happening all the time. If you’re not participating in them, it’s probably because you’re looking in all the wrong places. We’re here to help.
Over the last few years, Johannesburg has really established itself as one of the most exciting cities in the world. Our nightlife brings in tourists and keeps the locals entertained year-round. That’s not to say all Johannesburg hookup bars are winners. If you’re not careful, you’ll wind up having a sad, solitary night out.
Have too many of those nights and you’ll turn to hookup sites and apps. They can be the cure for the lonely bug but only if you sign up to the right ones. Sadly, most are pure garbage.
To help make your hookup hunt easier, we took it upon ourselves to find the best resources. From ritzy Saxonwold to trendy Braamfontein, locals have helped us find the best Johannesburg hookup sites, apps and bars. This list will supercharge your sex life, even if you’re visiting from Dobsonville.
Horny partners are out there. We’re here to make sure you find them. Read on for amazing local bars and digital hookup tools, then comment below to let us know how it goes.
You don’t have to spend another night in an empty bed if you don’t want to. Check out the best Johannesburg hookup sites, bars and apps for finding what you crave.
Located at the corner of Bolton and Jan Smuts Roads, Sin Tax is equal parts sexy, sultry and sleazy. A hidden, speakeasy-style entrance leads you into a dimly lit den for drinking and misbehaving. This lounge welcomes you in with its enticing atmosphere but the exquisite drinks will keep you coming back. And, of course, the company.
If you’re looking for a spot to meet a match off of an app, Sin Tax is a smart choice. It’s wise to book ahead as you might not get in on the busier weekend nights if you don’t. Once you’re in, their rotating menu of cocktails includes something for every taste. Meanwhile, the dark and cosy seating is the perfect recipe for getting intimate with a sexy new friend.
You may be under the impression that hooking up is a young man’s game. A lot of the newer apps sure seem to be geared towards college-aged users. But the most popular hookup site in the world is huge among people in their 30s and older. The appropriately named Adult FriendFinder is a website with over 90 million users, all looking for sexual healing. And that is exactly what AFF delivers.
When AFF launched in the 1990s, online hookups were a new concept. By the mid-00s, there were a plethora of other websites but AFF remained the most established. Little has changed over the years. AFF consistently tops our yearly list of the best hookup apps and sites. Newly launched Johannesburg hookup apps try to entice with pseudo-scientific promises and flashy tech but AFF keeps it simple.
While it's also an app, the AFF website offers a great browser interface for your computer and phone. We also love that is has a slick search function to help you find our perfect hookups. Prefer a particular cup size or looking for someone with a specific kink? You can search for them directly and then narrow your search by distance. No wonder most users say they would be happy to only use AFF.
There are a lot of options out there to try but nothing we've seen more reliably helps guys find single women to hookup with.
The real appeal of the site, though, is its diverse user base. If you’re a man or woman in your 30s, there is no easier way to get laid. It’s simply the best site of its kind with the most eclectic users. Even if you aren’t in the top percentage in terms of looks, you will get lucky. Few Johannesburg hookup sites or apps can claim to deliver like AFF does.
With its unparalleled popularity in cities all over the world, AFF will be your best friend at home or abroad. Whatever you look like, whatever your age, don’t just fall for the flashy bells and whistles. Adult FriendFinder has perfected the hookup game for the modern era.
The new wave of cocktail lounges is heavy on gimmicks and overly elaborate themes. Sometimes you want a well-made drink without all the flash and pretension. That’s what the Parkview bar Blind Tiger Cafe offers its patrons. The cocktails are delicious, the wine list is extensive and the food is light and refreshing.
Blind Tiger Cafe is ideal for a casual meetup or a romantic date. Its décor is sophisticated and appealing but it doesn’t feel stuffy. You also won’t feel like you have to be on the cutting edge of trends to fit in. The service is great and the vibe is relaxed. What a perfect mix for getting close with a sexy companion.
In the realm of hookup sites and apps, one niche has started to dwarf all others. Men of all ages are obsessed with cougars, or women over 35. There are dozens of apps and sites specifically for that demographic, which we review every year. However, one stands above the rest. If you’re looking for Johannesburg hookups with older women, Cougar Life is as easy as they come.
Women over 35 are incredibly sexy and reliably experienced lovers. There is no age limit on wanting mind-blowing sex. The original purpose of Cougar Life was to create a safe space for younger men and older women to connect. Over time, though, the app’s male user base has grown to include all ages. If you’ve smartly realized that cougars are your sexual preference, join the over seven million Cougar Life users. That includes millions of women in cities around the world, and Johannesburg is full of them as well.
For older women, pressure-free hookups can be hard to come by. They’re too busy to spend all night at a bar waiting for men to work up the nerve to approach. They can make the first move, of course, but many people judge sexually aggressive women. That’s especially true when they’re older. The risk of rejection or humiliation is real. That’s why so many turn to Cougar Life, the highest quality app of its kind.
Maybe you’re on the many men who have only ever had young lovers. You want to get with a cougar but are worried you’ll make a fool of yourself. Never fear, we offer a class on how to approach and date a woman in her 30s. After our course, your confidence will soar. Then you’ll be all set to download Cougar Life and turn your sexual romps into adventures. The app tells you when someone checks out your profile so you can find a fantastic lover in Johannesburg tonight.
The coffee house is an underrated avenue for making an erotic match. From early morning to evening, a café is an ideal arena for social connections. The relaxed, unrushed atmosphere and comfortable seating mean you can sit for hours, talking and getting to know someone. Even if you arrive alone, it’s relatively easy to start up a chat with an attractive stranger and find girls who want to hookup (although it will take more work than a bar or club).
For us, one of the most inviting Johannesburg cafés is Craft Coffee in Parktown North. As is essential for the best coffee shops, the roasters behind Craft Coffee take their “craft” seriously. More importantly, though, this café is spacious and excellent for long conversations. If your game is better in the day, this will be your favourite spot for Johannesburg hookups.
If you are looking to impress on a date, especially with an older woman, consider The Ivy Champagne Garden. This rooftop bar includes captivating Joburg views that will spark conversation and set the mood. Set in Bedfordview, this is the kind of place where style and a little bit of flaunting pays off. In other words, leave your t-shirt at home.
Open until midnight Thursday through Sunday, The Ivy Champagne Garden can be your go-to spot for dates or after-dinner drinks. Its menu is a refined fusion of African and Asian influence and their cocktails are appropriately high octane. If you prefer your Johannesburg hookups with a more mature partner, this is where you come to impress.
There are plenty more options for Johannesburg hookups if you haven’t found the right one yet. Keep reading for even more great ideas.
Like most of the world, Johannesburg has become obsessed with craft beer. Breweries and beer gardens are starting to pop up all over. Of all the new beer halls, few have taken advantage of their space as well as Mad Giant Brewery on Fox Street. With towering ceilings for their indoor beer hall and a massive outdoor beer garden, this is a drinker’s paradise.
We’re especially big fans of the beer garden. As an alternative to dark pubs, beer gardens are inviting and always a good time. Even people who aren’t big drinkers will enjoy a few brews in the sun. That’s why you’ll find so many of Johannesburg’s most alluring locals hanging out at Mad Giant. That’s obviously why you should be there too.
Since 2012, Tinder has dominated the conversation around hookup culture. Other sites and apps came first and many have popped up in its wake. In the minds of most Millennials, though, Johannesburg hookup apps begin and end with Tinder.
Much of Tinder’s appeal is also why it can be so frustrating for some users. With its focus on profile pictures over detailed bios, the app has become a gathering spot for Johannesburg’s hottest locals. If you can’t take a pretty picture, your matches will be few and far between. The men who aren’t in the top 10-15% of looks rarely score. For women, being in the top 50% will keep your dance card full.
Speaking of frustrating, don’t be surprised if you match with an absolute stunner and she never replies. The most beautiful women on Tinder are usually just on there for the ego boosts, not real hookups. Oh well, just keep swiping.
Beyond looks, it pays to be young on Tinder. The original users that made Tinder so popular have all gotten too old for it. The ideal age range is 18 to 28. That’s why students at the University of Johannesburg and Witwatersrand are a reliable presence on the app. Get in while you’re still young and fit, and Tinder will be your favourite source of Johannesburg hookups. For everyone else, well, Adult FriendFinder is great.
The creators are hoping to expand Tinder’s reach into proper dating and relationships. We’re wondering, if it’s not broke, why fix it? Tinder isn’t for everyone but if you’re hot enough, you’ll love this app (for now, at least).
While cocktail lounges offer a traditionally sensual backdrop for a sexual rendezvous, they’re hardly the only game in town. Ratzbar in Melville is more of a common man's bar and that’s what makes it so appealing. It’s famously open-minded and welcoming, making it a gathering place for Joburg’s most exciting locals.
Are you looking for a scene where the music is loud, the crowd is exuberant and the drinks are affordable? Ratzbar is what you’re looking for. Their DJs play a mix of pop hits from the past and present, while the karaoke nights get consistently crowded. This is one of the Johannesburg hookup bars that is always busy. That’s good for you. More people means more opportunities.
After a while, hooking up at bars, lounges and even coffee houses can get a little old hat. It’s nice to have a challenge from time to time, to make sure your game is still fresh. If you’re feeling like testing out your best moves in a new locale, consider your local grocery store. Bananas aren’t the only thing you can pick up in the produce aisle. We’re dead serious.
Let’s say you’re at SUPERSPAR in Melville. It’s a large store that is regularly busy throughout the day. That means that at any given time, there are at least a few single ladies roaming those aisles. As long as you’re confident but not pushy, you can start a casual conversation. Once you’ve made the right opening, anything can happen from there.
If you’ve ever been to Hogshead in Illovo, you’ll know it isn’t some swanky lounge or seedy bar. It’s a classic pub with everything that suggests. The food is filling and delicious (try their burgers) and beer is always pouring from the taps. During the day, it’s just a regular lunch and dinner spot for families and friends. Late at night, though, Hogshead gets fun.
With their large selection of beers and mixed drinks, all at reasonable prices, Hogshead is a popular late-night watering hole. It’s a relaxed, unpretentious environment for hanging out with friends or getting to know someone new. The lack of pressure makes for a great night out where you don’t always have to impress your companion. Just be yourself and have a night to remember.
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