Guys who want to meet older women have one problem, where do you find them! When you have a very busy life of your own you need to be spending your time where it's most likely to pay off. It's not like these mature women are standing around with a sign on their forehead saying “Hey! Here I am so why don't you ask me out!” That would make it too easy.
Fortunately, our team has a lot of experience in this area and has put together a great list of the proven options men have. If you want to meet older ladies dating younger men (or men their own age) you have to put yourself in their shoes and approach your search in the right way. These are very busy women with a lot going on. Try out our favorite spots below and make the most of your time!
#1 - Upscale coffee shops are one of the easiest places to meet older women
If you have a Starbucks in your area get yourself there super early in the morning. Keep in mind that you are probably not the only one looking! It's pretty well known that coffee shops are some of the best places to find and meet a single cougar without much effort.
This is where the older businesswoman is going to be before heading off to her daily place of employment. Get in line and strike up some idle conversation with her. Ask her if she comes there often and can she recommend a really good latte or iced coffee. Just random, casual questions to get the conversational ball rolling is a good start.
No Starbucks? Well..you have to have some type of coffee shop-all towns do no matter how small they are. And everyone drinks some kind of brew first thing in the morning! You might even find that hot older women sneak out from work (or use their lunch hour) to grab a cup of something.
Hang around for a few days (but don't lurk!) to see what type of woman frequents the place. Just bring along a magazine or your laptop so you don't look conspicuous or suspicious. Be casual. And then make the first move on the older woman you spot.
After a few days of observation, you may see an older woman who comes in often and then you might try to strike up a conversation with her.
#2 - Meeting older women can be a lot easier online
When you're a busy guy that needs the easiest and most efficient way to meet a lot of single older ladies online dating is going to be your best bet. A lot of women have changed how they're dating and have basically given up meeting guys the old fashioned way are ONLY looking to meet men using the dating sites below.
If you want to be where they're looking these are the best sites and apps for both men and women:
eHarmony is the easiest way to find a relationship (try it now)
If you're really looking for something long-term eHarmony (which has a great trial offer now) is one of the best dating sites out there we've tried (we tested out and reviewed 100+ dating sites in our annual review) with both the highest number of hot older women as well as the women who are most active in responding and meeting up offline.
There may be other sites out there but good luck finding as many single older women as you will here. Most other sites do a terrible job of making an older woman feel comfortable and wanted so they don't stick around long. eHarmony is so good that 75% of all marriages that begin online start with eHarmony! That's an amazing success rate and really show that these women are looking to find love!
The women using eHarmony are WAY more motivated to meet up with guys than other sites!
With eHarmony you know that every woman on the site is extremely motivated to actually meet guys instead of just looking around. The signup process is more involved and takes more time than other sites to complete the user profiles so all the women who are just looking for attention or a distraction are filtered out. That means all the women who complete their questionnaire are very, very motivated to respond to your messages or message you first (not to mention meet up offline)!
Guys who haven't check out their proven trial are leaving a lot of options on the table!
We admit it does take a little longer to get set up on eHarmony than other dating sites but it's well worth the effort. If you want to meet some great women it's worth putting in a few extra minutes. Every guy needs to do themselves a favor and give their proven trial a shot to see what we mean. No other site comes close for real relationships or making it easy to meet someone.
AFF is the best option if you just want a casual thing without the relationship (try it free)
When it comes to quickly and easily meeting older ladies for a quick fling or a mostly physical relationship there are really two options for a guy: Tinder and AFF (which you can try for free). Both have their advantages for different groups of guys but there is one dating app that is WAY better for meeting older women.
Tinder is the clear favorite dating site if you want to meet girls between 18 and 25. If you want to meet an older woman, say 30-35+ Tinder just isn't that great. Most women over 35 didn't grow up using Tinder and have a big aversion to using it now since it is full of people much younger than them.
AFF really fills the gap (no pun intended) when it comes to meeting women who are more mature. They have been around since 2006 and have over 50 million members, which gives most guys a lot more options. Women who are looking for something short-term tend to avoid Tinder and gravitate here (not necessarily to find love).
We have had the best success using AFF to meet older women for casual fun and are confident that you will as well!
One other thing worth mentioning that many guys experience on Tinder, it can be really challenging to get attention if you are not a good looking guy. In our experience, 80%+ of all the female attention goes to the top 10% of guys. That doesn't leave a lot for the rest of us who are not male models. AFF has a much more even playing field since it isn't 100% picture-based. Give their free trial a shot and you can see for yourself.
When you're not getting great results in your dating life you need to make some changes. AFF is a great first start and it's a place where even guys who don't have great skills with women can be very successful.
Cougar Life is also solid for younger guys dating older women (try it free)
Finding a lot of women who are interested in dating a younger guy is always a challenge but there are many reasons why it's worthwhile. It helps to use a dating site that specifically caters to that. After trying out over 100 different options we're confident that Cougar Life (which you can try for free here) is the best way to meet attractive single women over 35 if you're a fair bit younger than them.
With over 7 million active members you are going to have a lot of options here!
There are a few reasons why Cougar Life's dating app works so well in our experience:
If you haven't had much success with online dating you're not alone. Most of the dating sites out there are filled with women just looking for attention or an ego boost without any real intention of meeting up with a guy. Cougar Life is VERY different (check out their free trial and see).
In public or on more traditional sites a lot of women interested in dating younger guys are shy or embarrassed to admit it, even if there isn't any reason to. There is a bit of a stigma against dating younger guys in some circles and they don't want to stand out.
On Cougar Life every woman is proudly looking for guys of all ages and younger guys will be pleasantly surprised by what that means!
It can be very tough to find an older woman interested in dating a younger guy on most sites. Cougar Life is full of them. Nowhere else are you going to find more attractive women 35+ more interested in meeting younger guys. Both younger and older guys can do well here too but the younger guys really shine (compared to other sites).
You don't have to waste a lot of time on women who aren't interested or have that awkward conversation. You can confidently message them all and get to the point fast.
If you are a guy in his 20's or 30's looking for an older woman give their free trial a look and see what your options are. If you are older it's still going to be your best chance to meet a lot of single women 35+ without wasting time. Avoid all the wasted time and energy on other more general sites and get down to business.
#3 - Mid to high-end grocery stores attract a lot of more mature women
A girls gotta eat and that means going to the grocery store. Making a regular habit of regularly walking around your local grocery store without any headphones is a great way to expand your options. Most women are going to be at the grocery store once a week and there are few other places they will be at so frequently.
In our experience, the best time of day to go is between 5 PM and 8 PM Monday through Thursday for both men and women. This is when stores tend to be the busiest and when most women are doing their shopping after they get off work.
The grocery store is a very easy place to strike up a conversation because you can just ask the woman a question about the food they're looking at. A low-risk opening that is easy to pull off. When you know what to expect from older women it makes it much easier to meet them. Who is looking to find love and avocados at the same time?
#4 - Parks (especially dog parks) are fantastic places to find older women
Do you have a dog? If not, get one, or borrow one from a friend. Offer to take the critter for a walk around town or in the park! Mature women love to see a young guy walking his pet and she might strike up a conversation with you-especially if she has a dog of her own.
Dog parks are especially good for this because it usually involves all the dog owners standing around chatting for fifteen or twenty minutes as their pets get exercise. Its a really easy and casual way to strike up a conversation with an attractive woman, especially if you're not great at getting things started.
You could take a blanket along and lounge around while Fido does his thing, or you can actively seek the attention of an older woman by asking her a question or two about her own pet. It's one of the best ways to pick up older women.
You should know within minutes of meeting someone if she is interested. If she gives you the brush-off take the hint. Don't press it or you may wind up being arrested for ..stalking or something! A hot older woman looking for younger men tend to be pretty open about it if you make the first move so don't press too hard if you are not seeing any interest.
Before you go any further you can check out our video guide as well (if you're tired of reading).
Once the sun has set there are a lot of new options to find single older ladies. These are the options that have worked out well for us:
#5 - Bars (especially wine bars) are tried and true options
Just like with their younger counterparts, more mature women are also looking at bars as a place to meet single guys. Where you go really depends on what you are looking for! Do you want a relationship that is going to actually go somewhere, or are you just testing the waters to see if dating an older woman is really what you want to do? Are you looking for a quick hook-up and a one night stand? Is a night of pleasurable sex what you have in mind? Or do you want to approach a woman at a bar and see how it goes?
There are a few different types of bars that tend to be the best options for more mature women. Tries these out first before you head to the typical dive bar:
You will always find older women at piano bars
Piano bars are like crack for many women. The high energy from the piano players, dancing from the patrons, and overall fun atmosphere makes this a really solid option. It's very easy to move around the crowd, strike up a conversation, and even do a little impromptu dancing.
If there is one thing synonymous with single women it's their universal love of wine. Wine bars are also great because they tend to be a little classier and easier to have an actual conversation in. A little sexy glance your way, especially in such an intimate space, is already an invitation to make the first move. If you're not into clubs, wine bars are what you're looking for.
Much like wine bars, lounges are a great relaxed atmosphere that make having an actual conversation fairly easy. Women with a few more years under their belt tend to prefer low-key lounges over the loud and stinky bars and clubs filled with twenty-somethings.
Try out the popular bars that fall into these categories first and see how it goes. Every night is different and will have a different balance of men and women.
#6 - Yoga classes are surprisingly good for meeting older women
If you are looking to meet an older woman who cares about her body and likes to stay flexible yoga classes are fantastic. There are a few things about yoga classes that really make them stand out:
First, most of these classes are going to be 80% or more women. Many guys are intimidated when it comes to trying out yoga so you are not going to have a lot of competition in these classes. There is also quite a bit of mingling that happens before and after the class begins which can make striking up a conversation pretty easy.
Second, you are much more likely to find women 35+ at a yoga class than at the gym. Meeting older women in a standard gym chain can be pretty tough since many of them aren't interested in lifting weights and only use the cardio machines. If you have ever tried to talk to a woman on a treadmill you know how hard it can be!
Lastly, yoga studios are very friendly and open places. If you go there with an open mind and a friendly attitude you are going to enjoy yourself.
Need a little boost? Check out our guide for how to approach women at the gym.
Where Dating Pros Meet Older Women
It's worth mentioning again how important online dating has become to meeting older women. Most older women are meeting guys online now, many ONLY look online. It can be hard to decide on the right app for you and our dating coaches have 3 options that have worked the best for regular guys lately:
|Site||Our Experience||Our Rating||Free Trial Link|
Best For Relationships
Best For Casual Fun
|Try AFF For Free|
Decent For Younger Guys
|Cougar Life Highlights|
|Try Cougar Life|
#7 - Restaurants with good bars are especially nice
Get yourself a part-time job as a waiter or bartender in a nice eatery, or just make it a habit to spend time there, if you are dead serious about this. Older women tend to frequent these places for an afternoon drink or an evening meal. And the great thing about this is they rarely come in alone, so again you may have more than one choice here!
Get to know them, learn their names, and remember them--yes, that includes the waitress! Make it a point to recall what drinks they like to order or foods they like to eat, and of course, flirt a little! Just don't go overboard. A little mystery is fascinating to any mature woman, but especially so for an older one.
The best restaurants are those that have an extensive bar and are very busy during the week. These attract a lot of people in town for business and that includes a TON of single women. These are often popular steakhouses close to a lot of hotels. Women are getting off work, having a little dinner, and then sticking around to drink and meet guys.
Flattery is one of your best friends-and believe me-older women will remember it long after they leave. They (or she) will undoubtedly know what you are doing and will love it! Her friends may be envious of the attention she is getting and she will feel even better!
#8 - Cooking stores/classes are low-key solid
Women that love to cook are incredibly focused. They’ve learned how to please people, throw successful dinner parties and nurture relationships. They’re also knowledgeable about everything related to cooking (once you find her niche) – or else they are open to learning. Attending cooking classes is a perfectly ripe opportunity for a kitchen date. Just know WHEN to make a move on an older woman.
Type of women you’ll meet here: Women who have more than a basic level of cooking skills and look for excitement in the kitchen making new dishes that please you! A bonus here is if you can actually do a little cooking yourself.
#9 - Gyms make sense if you are looking for a fit and attractive older woman
Every town has a local gym, so get a membership and go there daily to work out. These places are known for having a mix of clientele of all ages. It's also a great place to demonstrate your, uh, physical attributes that might just leave older guys in the dust.
Older women looking for younger men, in particular, want to keep themselves in top shape by spending an hour or two in the gym a few days a week. If you are in good physical shape you can even offer to assist her in her workouts. Compliment her and let her know you think she looks great!
You can find out a lot just by asking subtle questions such as how often she comes there, how long has she been a member, what machines seem to work better than others. You know-casual stuff. You can even pretend you are clueless about working out and ask her if she has any suggestions for you or if she would be willing to give you a few pointers. Look for her the next time you come in and casually ask her if she wants to grab a drink (or coffee) afterward. So?
#10 - Cruises or Island Vacations have a lot of attractive older women
Have you ever considered other than somewhere in your own town? How about a vacation or a cruise? If you can afford it this may be the ideal way to step up your game and come out a winner. Many older women go on vacation either alone or with a group of friends! This is especially good for meeting older women seeking younger men.
A lot of women are looking to cut loose and have a good time on vacation. They're not looking for someone that will be the long-term partner, they want a fun guy to enjoy their time with. Younger guys are perfect for this!
Consider the possibilities because they are virtually endless. You can find a vacation that is affordable if you look online. Somewhere with hot lazy days, miles of beach and warm romantic nights is just the ticket to your hunt for that perfect older woman! Is an ocean cruise where to meet older women?
Or maybe-now that your imagination is in overdrive-where to meet older women will conjure up lots of other places! You just have to give it some serious thought.
How to pick up older women after meeting them
We've written dozens of articles on how to improve your chances of picking up older women but here are the cliff notes. Follow these general guidelines and you'll have a lot more success:
Be fun, playful, and direct
Before any woman is going to entertain moving you past the friendzone they have to enjoy being around you. Teasing, flirting, and joking around are all great ways to lighten the mood and ensure that both of you are having fun. You don't want to be constantly telling jokes, it's more about keeping things playful.
You can find more ways of doing this the right way here.
Understand her body language
Most women are going to tell you a lot more about what they're thinking from their body language than from their mouth. How they sit, how they look at you, and how they touch you are all major indicators of how things are progressing between the two of you.
If you need a little help in this area, check out our body language guide.
Shoot your shot
It's overused these days but you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Nobody likes getting shot down but 99.9% of the time the only downside is a bruised ego. Both men and women alike respect a guy who is willing to take a swing, even if the odds aren't amazing.
If you make it a habit of regularly asking for her number, asking her out, or offering to take her home you're going to have a lot better success than the guy who only goes for the "sure thing".