When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

Where and How to Meet Older Women In 2024 (Where We Had Success)


Are you into older women? If so, you’re in luck. As of the most recent United States Census data, there were approximately 67.26 million women aged 35 and older in the United States. This means that there are plenty of opportunities where you can meet older women!

Along with a host of top-notch venues, we also gathered a list of the top online options where you can meet single older women. Among all the dating apps and sites we’ve tried, here are the ones the worked for us consistently:

SiteOur ExperienceOur RatingFree Trial Link
Best For Relationships
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • Easily the best option for long-term relationships
  • 75% of all online marriages start here
  • 70% of users meet their spouse within a year
  • In-depth signup and matching process
Try eHarmony
Best For Casual Fun
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • The best way to meet women for casual relationships
  • Best results for regular guys
  • Over 60 million active members
  • Not good for long-term relationships
Try AFF For Free
Decent For Younger Guys
Cougar Life Highlights
Cougar Life Highlights
  • Focused on younger men meeting older women
  • A mix of relationships and hookups
  • Growing
  • Not as popular as eHarmony of AFF
Try Cougar Life

The appeal of an older woman is unlike anything else. One of the things men love about them is that they know exactly what they’re after. Yvette Brown, writer and dating expert at Hugs with Love, states, “Women who are older tend to be more aware of their needs and wants in a relationship and in life because they have had more time to learn about themselves over the course of their lives.” 

She goes on to emphasize how these women tend to avoid ambiguity, which a lot of men appreciates. “They might not play games the way kids do, and they might express their needs more bluntly,” she adds.

Methodology: How We Recommend the Best Places to Meet Older Women

Every BeyondAges writer follows strict and verifiable guidelines to bring our readers a comprehensive list of the best places for meeting older women. 

Unlike other dating sites, our recommendations and reviews are always up-to-date and based on decades of experience from dating coaches, experts, influencers, and industry professionals. We pride ourselves on having 100% unique content - not rehashes of stuff you can find elsewhere. 

What We Look At What It Means for Us
Deep-Dive App Reviews We spend weeks or even months on dating apps and sites to see what’s really going on. It’s all about understanding these platforms inside out.
Real Talk from Dating Pros Our dating and relationship coaches share their on-the-ground experiences. It's all about getting that insider scoop.
Been There, Done That Expertise We’ve been in the dating game for ages. Our advice? It’s based on real-world lessons, not just theory.
Keeping It Fresh Dating trends change, and so do we. We’re always exploring new dating hacks and ideas, so our advice stays relevant.
All About Online Vibes We’re big on online dating – apps, sites, chats, you name it. We dive deep to see how they really impact your dating life.
Chatting with Our Community Our readers are our fam. We love when they chime in with comments and stories – it makes everything we do so much more worthwhile.
Finding Older Women Hotspots We're on the lookout for the best spots to meet older women. This means checking out venues and online spaces where these fabulous ladies hang out.

Affiliate Disclaimer:

At BeyondAges, providing our audience with engaging and trustworthy content is our top priority. We participate in affiliate programs, which means if you make a purchase through our affiliate links, BeyondAges may earn a commission at no additional cost to you. This financial support is instrumental in allowing us to continue offering high-quality content. Our editorial content remains independent and unbiased. We take pride in our objective and detailed reviews and recommendations, focusing on products and services we genuinely believe are of value to our readers. Your support through these links is greatly appreciated and plays a key role in the BeyondAges community.

#1 - Upscale coffee shops are one of the easiest places to meet older women

Two single older women working at a coffee shopIf you have a Starbucks in your area get yourself there super early in the morning. Keep in mind that you are probably not the only one looking! It's pretty well known that coffee shops are some of the best places to find and meet a single cougar without much effort.

This is where the older businesswoman is going to be before heading off to her daily place of employment. Get in line and strike up some idle conversation with her. Ask her if she comes there often and can she recommend a really good latte or iced coffee. Just random, casual questions to get the conversational ball rolling is a good start.

No Starbucks? Well..you have to have some type of coffee shop-all towns do no matter how small they are. And everyone drinks some kind of brew first thing in the morning! You might even find that hot older women sneak out from work (or use their lunch hour) to grab a cup of something.

Hang around for a few days (but don't lurk!) to see what type of woman frequents the place. Just bring along a magazine or your laptop so you don't look conspicuous or suspicious. Be casual. And then make the first move on the older woman you spot.

After a few days of observation, you may see a woman who comes in often and then you might try to strike up a conversation with her.

How to Have a Coffee Date Like a Pro

  • Dating coach and regular BeyondAges contributor Scott Mahoney offers some great advice on what you need to do if you want to meet older women at coffee shops. In his in-depth guide “How to Have a Coffee Date Like A Dating Pro (Expert Guide)”, you’ll find a lot of actionable tips from Mahoney, including:
  • Choose the daytime: “Part of the logistics of a coffee date is to understand when coffee shops operate,” says Mahoney. “Very few coffee shops operate past the hours of 6 or 7 p.m. Therefore, the answer is obvious – most people don’t drink coffee at night, as it will interrupt their sleep pattern. Of course, there are non caffeinated drinks to choose from, but stick with a date in the middle of the day. 
  • Avoid the busy times: “A busy coffee shop can make the date go awry. Talking over one another or being distracted by patrons is never a good recipe for a date.”
  • Pick the right coffee shop: “Choosing the right coffee shop may take some reconnaissance beforehand. You should want to find a coffee shop that has the right clientele and friendly atmosphere. Starbucks is usually a neutral choice, as some people enjoy the consistency of their drinks and the atmosphere; however, an artsy date might not like the “mainstream” appeal of Starbucks.” 
  • Befriend the staff beforehand: “Also, be sure to make friends with the barista beforehand, as they can increase your social proof when it comes time for your date. A healthy rapport, especially with attractive female baristas, can spur on your date to view you more favorably and give her feedback on how other people see you.”

#2 -  Meeting older women can be a lot easier online

When you're a busy guy that needs the easiest and most efficient way to meet a lot of single older ladies it's best to try online dating, and more specifically older women dating sites. A lot of women have changed how they're dating and have basically given up meeting guys the old fashioned way are ONLY looking to meet men using the dating sites below.

If you want to be where they're looking these are the best sites and apps for both men and women:

eHarmony is the easiest way to find a relationship (try it now)

Homepage for eHarmony

If you're really looking for something long-term eHarmony (which has a great trial offer now) is one of the best older women dating sites out there we've tried (we tested out and reviewed 100+ dating sites in our annual review) with both the highest number of hot older women as well as the women who are most active in responding and meeting up offline.

There may be other sites out there but good luck finding as many single older women as you will here. Most other sites do a terrible job of making an older woman feel comfortable and wanted so they don't stick around long. eHarmony is so good that 75% of all marriages that begin online start with eHarmony! That's an amazing success rate and really show that these women are looking to find love!

The women using eHarmony are WAY more motivated to meet up with guys than other sites!

With eHarmony you know that every woman on the site is extremely motivated to actually meet guys instead of just looking around. The signup process is more involved and takes more time than other sites to complete the user profiles so all the women who are just looking for attention or a distraction are filtered out. That means all the women who complete their questionnaire are very, very motivated to respond to your messages or message you first (not to mention meet up offline)!

Guys who haven't check out their proven trial are leaving a lot of options on the table!

We admit it does take a little longer to get set up on eHarmony than other dating sites but it's well worth the effort. If you want to meet some great women it's worth putting in a few extra minutes. Every guy needs to do themselves a favor and give their proven trial a shot to see what we mean. No other site comes close for real relationships or making it easy to meet someone.

Need more info on how eHarmony works for a regular guy? We’ve created an eHarmony review where you can see how the site works, how you can meet people, and how you might one day find love online!

What people think of eHarmony

Cemile M. - SiteJabber

A fairly well-known online dating service is eHarmony. One of the best online dating services in the world, eHarmony has over 2 million subscribers. Since launching their "Get Married" campaign in 2000, it has urged people to get married. Everyone can use the site's free trials to check it out and see if they like it before committing to a membership plan.

Emory Sims - TrustPilot

I am very happy that eHarmony has been patient with me because I need time to make some personal adjustments before I decide to date. I am very happy and living the best days of my life. eharmony will help me find the right person. Thank you eharmony.

What was your experience like with eHarmony? Drop a comment below and share with the BeyondAges community. 


AFF is the best option if you just want a casual thing without the relationship (try it free)

AFF homepageWhen it comes to quickly and easily meeting older ladies for a quick fling or a mostly physical relationship there are really two options for a guy: Tinder and AFF (which you can try for free). Both have their advantages for different groups of guys but there is one dating app that is WAY better for meeting older women.

Tinder is the clear favorite dating site if you want to meet girls between 18 and 25. If you want to meet an older woman, say 30-35+ Tinder just isn't that great. Most women over 35 didn't grow up using Tinder and have a big aversion to using it now since it is full of people much younger than them.

AFF really fills the gap (no pun intended) when it comes to meeting women who are more mature. They have been around since 2006 and have over 50 million members, which gives most guys a lot more options. Women who are looking for something short-term tend to avoid Tinder and gravitate here (not necessarily to find love), which is why AFF is one of the best older women dating sites you can use today.

We have had the best success using AFF to meet older women for casual fun and are confident that you will as well!

One other thing worth mentioning is that many guys experience on Tinder, it can be really challenging to get attention if you are not a good looking guy. In our experience, 80%+ of all the female attention goes to the top 10% of guys. That doesn't leave a lot for the rest of us who are not male models. AFF has a much more even playing field since it isn't 100% picture-based. Give their free trial a shot and you can see for yourself.

When you're not getting great results in your dating life you need to make some changes. AFF is a great first start and it's a place where even guys who don't have great skills with women can be very successful.

To give you a more detailed look at how AFF works and how it performs for regular guys, you can also have a look at our Adult FriendFinder review.

User Testimonial for AFF

Ben Ware - Google Play

Plenty to do

Alison B. - Sitejabber

Been on there off and on 10 or so Years. Been to SEVERAL meets and parties! I've made tons of fun friends and have more fun clubbing and swinging with them then any other peer genre! Too many nasty old, fat, desperate mean with high expectations. True sex addicts and swingers love this site and it works well for them.

Try AFF For Free!
Using this link to AF's free trial offer you find out exactly why so many guys (younger and older) have had such great success finding older ladies who just want to head to the bedroom. It really is the best option for most guys of all ages that we've found, especially when you're not super good-looking.

How Popular are Casual Dating Apps?

Just about everyone has had some grief when it comes to using dating apps to find older women. Yet, they are still very much in wide use AND do lead to real-world results. According to a new survey from Pew Research Center on dating habits and online dating apps, the following stats show just how effective these apps are for finding older women:

  • Ease of Use: 42% of adults think dating apps make it easier to find a long-term partner, with 22% saying how apps make finding a partner harder, and about a third (32%) say it has made no difference.
  • Usage Demographics: Around 37% of adults aged 30 to 49 have tried online dating, whereas nearly 53% of adults under 30 have used a dating site or app. Approximately 20% of those aged 50 to 64 have used online dating platforms. Only 13% of adults 65 and older report having used a dating site or app.
  • Usage by Sex: Men (34%) are more likely than women (27%) to have used online dating.
  • Education: Individuals with some college education are more likely to have tried online dating compared to those with a high school education or less.
  • Marriage Status: Adults who have never been married report a higher usage of online dating sites or apps (52%) than married adults (16%).
  • Relationship Status: Adults currently living with a partner (46%) and those who are divorced, separated, or widowed (36%) are more likely to have used online dating platforms compared to married adults.
What was your experience like with AFF? Drop a comment below and share with the BeyondAges community.

Cougar Life is also solid for younger guys dating older women (try it free)

cougarlife.com homepage image

Finding a lot of women who are interested in dating younger men is always a challenge but there are many reasons why it's worthwhile. It helps to use a dating site that specifically caters to that. After trying out over 100 different options we're confident that Cougar Life (which you can try for free here) is the best way to meet attractive single women over 35 if you're a fair bit younger than them.

With over 7 million active members you are going to have a lot of options here!

There are a few reasons why Cougar Life's dating app works so well in our experience:

If you haven't had much success with online dating you're not alone. Most of the dating sites out there are filled with women just looking for attention or an ego boost without any real intention of meeting up with a guy. Cougar Life is VERY different (check out their free trial and see).

In public or on more traditional sites a lot of women interested in dating younger guys are shy or embarrassed to admit it, even if there isn't any reason to. There is a bit of a stigma against dating younger guys in some circles and they don't want to stand out.

On Cougar Life every woman is proudly looking for guys of all ages and younger guys will be pleasantly surprised by what that means!

It can be very tough to find an older woman interested in dating a younger guy on most sites. Cougar Life is full of them. Nowhere else are you going to find more attractive women 35+ more interested in meeting younger guys. Both younger and older guys can do well here too but the younger guys really shine (compared to other sites).

You don't have to waste a lot of time on women who aren't interested or have that awkward conversation. You can confidently message them all and get to the point fast.

If you are a guy in his 20's or 30's looking for an older woman give their free trial a look and see what your options are. If you are older it's still going to be your best chance to meet a lot of single women 35+ without wasting time. Avoid all the wasted time and energy on other more general sites and get down to business with this specifically dedicated older women dating site.

What people think of Cougar Life

Docdemort - TrustPilot

Online with so much baiting and scamming, its really hard to know these days what is a geniuine interaction with an actual human, or some computer generated BS, to bait you into spending money, but i guess sometimes the only way to know for sure is to go out and try it. I opened an account uploaded 1 picture, and simply let it sit for a long time, without doing anything. One good thing i can say is the peoples photos definitely seem to be real people as apposed to other sites who use fake models, and fake inbox messages. So the way this site operates, is it, tries to initiate a messaging situation, between you by sending you a message, about a girl and tries to get you to message her. Once that goes down, you have to buy credits in order to keep it going. ok so 500 credits 100$, actually i dont mind paying if this site can actually facilitate what it is purporting. so far im at 50/50 im still unsure if its real, although at this point i would guess that it is legitemate. the only way to know for sure is to invest. i will try, when i have the chance, and report back.

Is Cougar Life working for you? If so, leave a comment below and share your story.


#3 - Mid to high-end grocery stores attract a lot of more mature women

Grocery store produceA girls gotta eat and that means going to the grocery store. Making a regular habit of regularly walking around your local grocery store without any headphones is a great way to expand your options. Most women are going to be at the grocery store once a week and there are few other places they will be at so frequently.

In our experience, the best time of day to go is between 5 PM and 8 PM Monday through Thursday for both men and women. This is when stores tend to be the busiest and when most women are doing their shopping after they get off work.

The grocery store is a very easy place to strike up a conversation because you can just ask the woman a question about the food they're looking at. A low-risk opening that is easy to pull off. When you know what to expect from older women it makes it much easier to meet them. Who is looking to find love and avocados at the same time?

Grocery Store Dates from NPR

In an interview for NPR’s This American Life, NPR staff and contributor Fiona Geiran highlights an unorthodox setting for modern dating: The grocery store

“You can learn a lot about someone from what they add to the shopping cart,” says Geiran. “Does your date consider a protein bar to be a treat? Do they opt for the generic cookies or scoff at anything below the Milano shelf? Do they pair an energy drink with a can of spray cheese?” These questions, according to Geiran, reveal more about your potential new partner more than just getting together at a restaurant semi-regularly. 

Grocery stores also have some built-in challenges that will help you determine whether someone is right for you. For example, Geiran relates how restaurants come with the “unavoidable awkwardness” of deciding who will pay, which is where something like self-checkout is a similar crucible comes into play. 

Similar to the self-checkout challenge, the most important benefit of bringing a date to a grocery store before, say, having a picnic is that a grocery store date highlights “whether this person is willing to bring their energy and excitement to something very ordinary.” Geiran relates how her grandparents still went on dates in their old age, enjoying each other’s company into their golden years AND enjoying a relatively mundane experience. 

“Do romantic things in regular places. Because what could be more wonderful than regular love?”

#4 - Parks (especially dog parks) are fantastic places to find older women

Mature woman at a park readingDo you have a dog? If not, get one, or borrow one from a friend. Offer to take the critter for a walk around town or in the park! Mature women love to see a young guy walking his pet and she might strike up a conversation with you-especially if she has a dog of her own.

Dog parks are especially good for this because it usually involves all the dog owners standing around chatting for fifteen or twenty minutes as their pets get exercise. Its a really easy and casual way to strike up a conversation with an attractive woman, especially if you're not great at getting things started.

You could take a blanket along and lounge around while Fido does his thing, or you can actively seek the attention of an older woman by asking her a question or two about her own pet. It's one of the best ways to pick up older women.

You should know within minutes of meeting someone if she is interested. If she gives you the brush-off take the hint. Don't press it or you may wind up being arrested for ..stalking or something! A hot older woman looking for younger men tends to be pretty open about it if you make the first move so don't press too hard if you are not seeing any interest.

Before you go any further you can check out our video guide as well (if you're tired of reading).

Once the sun has set there are a lot of new options to find single older ladies. These are the options that have worked out well for us:

#5 - Bars (especially wine bars) are tried and true options

Women at a bar looking to meet guysJust like with their younger counterparts, more mature women are also looking at bars as a place to meet single guys. Where you go really depends on what you are looking for! Do you want a relationship that is going to actually go somewhere, or are you just testing the waters to see if dating a woman that's older than you is really what you want to do? Are you looking for a quick hook-up and a one night stand? Is a night of pleasurable sex what you have in mind? Or do you want to approach a woman at a bar and see how it goes?

There are a few different types of bars that tend to be the best options for more mature women. Tries these out first before you head to the typical dive bar:

You will always find older women at piano bars

Piano bars are like crack for many women. The high energy from the piano players, dancing from the patrons, and overall fun atmosphere makes this a really solid option. It's very easy to move around the crowd, strike up a conversation, and even do a little impromptu dancing.

Wine bars

If there is one thing synonymous with single women it's their universal love of wine. Wine bars are also great because they tend to be a little classier and easier to have an actual conversation in. A little sexy glance your way, especially in such an intimate space, is already an invitation to make the first move. If you're not into clubs, wine bars are what you're looking for.


Much like wine bars, lounges are a great relaxed atmosphere that make having an actual conversation fairly easy. Women with a few more years under their belt tend to prefer low-key lounges over the loud and stinky bars and clubs filled with twenty-somethings.

Try out the popular bars that fall into these categories first and see how it goes. Every night is different and will have a different balance of men and women.

Feeling rusty when it comes to picking women at the bar? BeyondAges has some great guides to point you in the right direction!

#6 - Yoga classes are surprisingly good for meeting older women

Group of older single women at a yoga class

If you are looking to meet an older woman who cares about her body and likes to stay flexible yoga classes are fantastic. There are a few things about yoga classes that really make them stand out:

First, most of these classes are going to be 80% or more women. Many guys are intimidated when it comes to trying out yoga so you are not going to have a lot of competition in these classes. There is also quite a bit of mingling that happens before and after the class begins which can make striking up a conversation pretty easy.

Second, you are much more likely to find women 35+ at a yoga class than at the gym. Meeting older women in a standard gym chain can be pretty tough since many of them aren't interested in lifting weights and only use the cardio machines. If you have ever tried to talk to a woman on a treadmill you know how hard it can be!

Lastly, yoga studios are very friendly and open places. If you go there with an open mind and a friendly attitude you are going to enjoy yourself.

Need a little boost? Check out our guide for how to approach women at the gym.

Where Dating Pros Meet Older Women

It's worth mentioning again how important online dating has become to meeting older women. Most older women are meeting guys online now, many ONLY look online. It can be hard to decide on the right app for you and our dating coaches have 3 options that have worked the best for regular guys lately:

SiteOur ExperienceOur RatingFree Trial Link
Best For Relationships
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • Easily the best option for long-term relationships
  • 75% of all online marriages start here
  • 70% of users meet their spouse within a year
  • In-depth signup and matching process
Try eHarmony
Best For Casual Fun
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • The best way to meet women for casual relationships
  • Best results for regular guys
  • Over 60 million active members
  • Not good for long-term relationships
Try AFF For Free
Decent For Younger Guys
Cougar Life Highlights
Cougar Life Highlights
  • Focused on younger men meeting older women
  • A mix of relationships and hookups
  • Growing
  • Not as popular as eHarmony of AFF
Try Cougar Life

#7 - Restaurants with good bars are especially nice

Outdoor cafe at nightGet yourself a part-time job as a waiter or bartender in a nice eatery, or just make it a habit to spend time there, if you are dead serious about this. Older women tend to frequent these places for an afternoon drink or an evening meal. And the great thing about this is they rarely come in alone, so again you may have more than one choice here!

Get to know them, learn their names, and remember them--yes, that includes the waitress! Make it a point to recall what drinks they like to order or foods they like to eat, and of course, flirt a little! Just don't go overboard. A little mystery is fascinating to any mature woman, but especially so for an older one.

The best restaurants are those that have an extensive bar and are very busy during the week. These attract a lot of people in town for business and that includes a TON of single women. These are often popular steakhouses close to a lot of hotels. Women are getting off work, having a little dinner, and then sticking around to drink and meet guys.

Flattery is one of your best friends-and believe me-older women will remember it long after they leave. They (or she) will undoubtedly know what you are doing and will love it! Her friends may be envious of the attention she is getting and she will feel even better!

#8 - Cooking stores/classes are low-key solid

Single ladies learning to cookWomen that love to cook are incredibly focused. They’ve learned how to please people, throw successful dinner parties and nurture relationships. They’re also knowledgeable about everything related to cooking (once you find her niche) – or else they are open to learning. Attending cooking classes is a perfectly ripe opportunity for a kitchen date. Just know WHEN to make a move on an older woman.

Type of women you’ll meet here: Women who have more than a basic level of cooking skills and look for excitement in the kitchen making new dishes that please you! A bonus here is if you can actually do a little cooking yourself.

#9 - Gyms make sense if you are looking for a fit and attractive older woman

Several women working out Every town has a local gym, so get a membership and go there daily to work out. These places are known for having a mix of clientele of all ages. It's also a great place to demonstrate your, uh, physical attributes that might just leave older guys in the dust.

Older women looking for younger men, in particular, want to keep themselves in top shape by spending an hour or two in the gym a few days a week. If you are in good physical shape you can even offer to assist her in her workouts. Compliment her and let her know you think she looks great!

You can find out a lot just by asking subtle questions such as how often she comes there, how long has she been a member, what machines seem to work better than others. You know-casual stuff. You can even pretend you are clueless about working out and ask her if she has any suggestions for you or if she would be willing to give you a few pointers. Look for her the next time you come in and casually ask her if she wants to grab a drink (or coffee) afterward. So?

Gym Dating: A New Approach?

Instead of meeting your date at the gym, why not take your date to the gym? A recent article from Glamour titled "‘Workout Wooing’ Is the Latest Dating Trend to Wrap Your Head Around" by Anya Meyerowitz highlights the growing trend of gym dates. To save you time, we’ve pulled out some of the most notable quotes, but do yourself a favor and read the entire piece:

  • More Fitness and Dating: "Over one in five (22%) Gen Z and millennials (18 – 34-year-olds) have exercised or attended a fitness class on a first date, with popular workouts including HIIT, running, and Pilates or yoga." - This statistic highlights the growing trend of incorporating fitness activities into the dating scene.
  • Healthier Alternatives than Bars: "The research also shows that many Gen Z and millennials would choose a fitness-based date over one involving alcohol, with 29% saying they would rather attend a fitness class on a first date than go to a bar."
  • Shared Activities and Common Ground: “It's unsurprising...that many on the hunt for love are keen to incorporate exercises,” says Tami Sobell, relationship therapist. “If you're an avid exerciser, then taking a date to a class is a good way of scoping out shared interests and getting those endorphins pumping together.”
  • Less Pressure than Traditional Dates: “It also gives people something to do—and discuss—on a first date, as during a workout there is unlikely to be space for any awkward silences,” adds Sobell.
  • Shared Experience: Naomi Walkland, Bumble vice president of Europe, notes, “Dating, especially early on, is all about experiences, and what better way to connect than share something that you love?” 

#10 - Cruises or Island Vacations have a lot of attractive older women

Have you ever considered other than somewhere in your own town? How about a vacation or a cruise? If you can afford it this may be the ideal way to step up your game and come out a winner. Many older women go on vacation either alone or with a group of friends! This is especially good for meeting older women looking for younger men.

A lot of women are looking to cut loose and have a good time on vacation. They're not looking for someone that will be the long-term partner, they want a fun guy to enjoy their time with. Younger guys are perfect for this!

Consider the possibilities because they are virtually endless. You can find a vacation that is affordable if you look online. Somewhere with hot lazy days, miles of beach and warm romantic nights is just the ticket to your hunt for that perfect older woman! Is an ocean cruise where to find older women?

Or maybe-now that your imagination is in overdrive-where to meet older women will conjure up lots of other places! You just have to give it some serious thought.

How to pick up older women after meeting them

We've written dozens of articles on how to improve your chances of picking up older women but here are the cliff notes. Follow these general guidelines and you'll have a lot more success:

Be fun, playful, and direct

Before any woman is going to entertain moving you past the friendzone they have to enjoy being around you. Teasing, flirting, and joking around are all great ways to lighten the mood and ensure that both of you are having fun. You don't want to be constantly telling jokes, it's more about keeping things playful.

You can find more ways of doing this the right way here.

Understand her body language

Most women are going to tell you a lot more about what they're thinking from their body language than from their mouth. How they sit, how they look at you, and how they touch you are all major indicators of how things are progressing between the two of you.

If you need a little help in this area, check out our body language guide.

Shoot your shot

It's overused these days but you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Nobody likes getting shot down but 99.9% of the time the only downside is a bruised ego. Both men and women alike respect a guy who is willing to take a swing, even if the odds aren't amazing.

If you make it a habit of regularly asking for her number, asking her out, or offering to take her home you're going to have a lot better success than the guy who only goes for the "sure thing".

Safety & Precautions about Dating Older Women

When engaging in a relationship with an older woman, certain safety and precautionary measures should be taken into account. To help you learn what you need to know, here are some experts on the topic courtesy of Zoosk and relationship writer Ashley Papa:

  1. Respect Her Independence: "Older women still want their man, regardless of age, to act like a man. They expect chivalry," says Dr. Wyatt Fisher, a licensed psychologist and marriage counselor. This highlights the importance of respecting her independence and maturity.
  2. Financial Stability and Expectations: "Many older women prefer a guy who’s stable," the article notes. This implies the significance of being financially responsible and not overly dependent on the older partner.
  3. Cultural and Activity Interests: "Many older women appreciate a man who has a variety of cultural interests," says Dr. Fisher. It's crucial to share and engage in diverse experiences and activities.
  4. Language Sensitivity: "Do not call that hot 40-something an ‘older woman’ because all she heard was ‘old’," warns Billy Procida, a stand-up comedian and host of The Manwhore Podcast. This advice is about being sensitive to how you refer to their age.
  5. No Drama Policy: "Most older women with a career, confidence, ample dating experience... will not be shy about saying what they want from you," explains Billy Procida. This suggests the importance of maturity and directness in the relationship.
  6. Consistency in Actions: "Older women appreciate consistency," says Boe McCrimmon Jr, a relationship expert. It's essential to ensure that your actions align with your words.
  7. Understanding Priorities with Moms: "If you’re dating a mother...they are always going to put their kids before you," states Billy Procida. Understanding and respecting her priorities as a mother is crucial.
  8. Commitment Readiness: "Most older women appreciate a man who isn’t scared of commitment," suggests Dr. Wyatt Fisher. It's important to be clear and sincere about your intentions for a serious relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions about Dating Older Women

What Are Effective Strategies to Approach Older Women in Public Places?

When approaching older women in public places, it's important to be respectful and confident. Start with a friendly conversation relevant to the setting. Compliments can work but should be genuine and not overly personal.

Can Attending Yoga Classes Regularly Improve Chances of Meeting Older Women?

Yes, attending yoga classes can improve your chances as it's a social activity with a good mix of ages. Regular attendance helps in building familiarity and comfort, which can facilitate easier interactions.

How Can One Optimize Their Online Dating Profile to Attract Older Women?

To attract older women online, ensure your profile is mature, sincere, and reflects your interests. Use clear and recent photos, and highlight aspects of your life that might appeal to an older demographic, like career achievements or hobbies.

Are Cooking Classes Effective for Meeting Older Women?

Yes, cooking classes can be effective as they offer an interactive environment. They are usually attended by people who value culinary skills and can provide a great way to bond over a shared interest.

What Are the Benefits of Using Online Dating Sites Specifically for Older Women?

Using sites specifically for older women helps target your dating efforts, as these sites cater to women interested in either younger or age-similar men, reducing the effort in finding a match.

How Can One Navigate Age Differences When Dating Older Women?

To navigate age differences, focus on mutual interests and respect. Be open to learning from her experiences, but also share your own perspectives. Communication and understanding are key.

What Are Some Good Conversation Topics for a First Date with an Older Woman?

Good topics include her interests, travel experiences, books, movies, and hobbies. Avoid dwelling on the age difference or topics that might highlight a generation gap.

How Important Is Lifestyle Compatibility When Dating Older Women?

Lifestyle compatibility is crucial when dating older women, as it ensures that you share similar interests and values, making the relationship more sustainable.

Can Participating in Charity or Volunteer Work Be a Way to Meet Older Women?

Yes, charity or volunteer work can be an excellent way to meet older women. Such settings often attract compassionate and caring individuals and provide a common ground for initial conversations.

What Safety Precautions Should Be Taken When Meeting Older Women From Online Platforms?

When meeting someone from online platforms, choose public places for initial meetings, inform a friend or family member about your plans, and trust your instincts regarding any red flags.


Brooks, E. (2023) How to find and meet single cougars in 2023—What you’re doing wrong. Beyond Ages. 

Colada, G. (2023) How to approach a woman at the gym and create attraction every time. Beyond Ages.

Dey, J. (2023) How to make the first move on an older woman. Beyond Ages.

Duncan, J. (2019) 5 things to expect when dating a mature woman. Medium.

Geiran, F. (2023) Take your date to the grocery store. NPR.

Greene, J. (2023) How to talk to girls at bars and get them interested in you every time. Beyond Ages.

Hughes, J. (2023) 10 glaring mistakes to avoid when picking up girls at a bar. Beyond Ages.

Lefroy, E. (2023) Gen Z is making first dates go to yoga and bootcamp — instead of the bar. New York Post.

Mahoney, S. (2023) 10 signals in older women’s body language that say she is interested. Beyond Ages.

Mahoney, S. (2023) How to have a coffee date like a dating pro. Beyond Ages.

Meyerowitz, A. (2023) ‘Workout wooing’ is the latest dating trend to wrap your head around. Glamour.

Miss Doll (2023) 9 extremely common mistakes men make when picking up women. Beyond Ages.

Papa, A. (2023) 8 things you should know about dating older women. The Date Mix by Zoosk.

Saulis, A. (2023) How to make the first move on an older woman in 7 steps. Beyond Ages.

Senkus, T. (2023) Adult FriendFinder review 2023. Beyond Ages.

Senkus, T. (2023) 2023 eHarmony review. Beyond Ages.

Stevens, M. (2023) Experts review and rank the best cougar dating apps and sites for 2023. Beyond Ages.

Vogels, E. & McClain, C. (2023) Key findings about online dating in the U.S. Pew Research Center.

Wang, K. (2023) How to pick up older women from a woman who knows. Beyond Ages.

Contributing Authors:

Tom Senkus

For more than two decades, Tom has dated extensively and studied behavioral psychology as a way of understanding the complexities of human nature until he became an expert. After traveling as a touring musician and living in more than 15 countries, Tom has cross-referenced his experience in seduction, dating, and interpersonal dynamics with the ever-changing landscape of 21st-century dating. His work as a writer has appeared in 500+ publications (digital and print). Tom is also the author of several books (available on Amazon). In his free time, you can find Tom recording music and cooking the best Cincinnati-style chili you’ve ever had.

Andrius Saulis

Andrius, the mind behind Saulis Dating, is a professional dating coach and educator with over a decade of hands-on experience, who shows men how to deal with their insecurities and self-esteem issues, and teaches guys how to have consistently great dates that end up in casual hookups or serious relationships.

He has taught thousands of guys how to master their inner game by getting rid of their anxiety, shyness, nervousness, self-doubt, feat, and various mental blocks and limiting beliefs that hold most men back from being awesome with women! Andrius is also a successful author (Amazon) who has published multiple books on dating and relationships that have been highly received.


Join Our Newsletter

No Spam. Just Higher Dating Success.

Leave a Comment