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2024 Guide to Successfully Dating in Mesa According to Experts Who Know

Dating in Mesa at a wine bar

We’ll be completely upfront with you: The dating scene in Mesa can be a frustrating experience for single people. Whether you’re out looking for a date in Mesa or around the nearby Phoenix metro area, many Mesa singles often ask themselves “How can I find a partner in Mesa?”

The truth is there are plenty of singles in Mesa. The only challenge is that finding singles around this unique city is dealing with the long-lasting effects of the pandemic. Plus, the new habits of single people adjusting to the “new normal”, have changed the entire game. Even if you hit up your old haunts and tried-and-true spots, things have changed.

Is there a solution to your modern dating woes? Of course, there is - and BeyondAges is at your service to show you the way. With planning, some effort on your part, and realistic expectations, finding a date in Mesa is actually much easier than in similarly-sized cities. The catch is that you’ll have to be open-minded enough to explore the ENTIRE Mesa dating scene and make things happen (not simply trying what you’ve done in the past). You will be surprised at what changing your entire approach and outlook can mean for creating an enjoyable dating experience!

Continue reading this entire article to learn the most proven suggestions on where to meet Mesa singles, great Mesa date ideas to build rapport, Mesa dating apps to boost your odds, and some of our favorite date spots around Mesa.

What Dating in Mesa Is Like Right Now

Mesa gender breakdown

Let's begin by looking at what the Mesa dating scene is like at the moment:

First, many singles choose Mesa for its great desert climate, affordable standard of living, and livability index higher than other cities in Arizona. With many businesses and governmental entities here like Banner Health, Mesa Public Schools, The Boeing Company, and more, single people are calling Mesa home for its access to limitless economic opportunities.

There is also quite a bit of diversity in the type of partners you can find here, especially when compared to Arizona. This means that finding the most compatible partner is actually attainable if you’re willing to put in the effort.

Here’s a breakdown of what Mesa’s single demographics look like:

  • Total population: 497,275
  • Percentage: 33.50%
  • Total singles: 166,587
  • Single men: 84,887
  • Single women: 81,700

33.5% of the total population looking for a partner means you’ve got pretty good odds of actually finding someone by playing your cards right. Now, we all heard the common lament:

If there are so many available singles in Mesa, why am I still single for so long?

The answer is that having plenty of dating options doesn’t automatically mean that your dating experience in Mesa is going to be easy. In fact, dating in Mesa will most likely be harder because of the intense competition throughout the city and the restrictions that come from the pandemic (ie. vaccination status, mask restrictions, etc.). Nevertheless, a realistic outlook should be encouraging to your overall outlook.

Where to Meet Someone to Date in Mesa

At BeyondAges, we believe in being as honest and upfront with our readers as to the realities of modern dating as possible. To start, making a list of the best places to find someone to date in Mesa is a near-impossible task. There’s simply too much going on in Mesa and the surrounding area to choose from!

Instead, we’ll share some of the best places to meet attractive Mesa singles that are looking for something more serious (we have a comprehensive article on where to find Mesa hookups if that’s what you’re looking for). These are places that tend to have the following criteria in common when you’re on the lookout for candidates for serious relationships:

  • Lots of available singles
  • Lively atmosphere where fun is encouraged
  • Easy to rub elbows with new people
  • A quiet environment to have a normal conversation
  • Alcohol is always welcome and appreciated
  • Isn’t too pricey

Before we get into some specific recommendations of where to go, let's briefly turn our attention to Mesa dating apps:

Why you should be using at least one app

Are you using at least one dating app right now? If your answer is “no”, you are missing out on who’s out there in Mesa’s highly-competitive dating market.

With social-distancing guidelines remaining a high priority for many people, more Mesa singles are relying on apps to access the largest pool of singles at their convenience and safety. For better or worse, dating apps are part of today’s dating zeitgeist.

Does this mean that dating apps in Mesa are the only way to go? Of course not, but it can be a struggle if you only have a limited amount of free time, and want to save on spending your hard-earned cash.

If you've struggled in the past with choosing which app works for you, check out our rankings of the best dating apps in Mesa to find out which apps best fit the type of relationship and partner you’re looking for. If you're pressed for time and don’t want to read the full article, these Mesa dating apps are the best overall choices:

  • eHarmony is simply the best choice you can make among all Mesa dating apps for serious relationships in Mesa. Try eHarmony today for a free trial!
  • AFF is one of the best dating apps in Mesa for finding sexy, kinky fun with some of the best features you’ll find out there. Try AFF’s free trial today!

After trying out dozens of popular dating apps in Mesa, we've learned what actually gets results. Be sure to check out our rankings for more comprehensive info and use the right apps for finding available singles. Now, let's talk about our favorite spots around Mesa.

New course

The best singles bars in Mesa

Single women at September's Bar Mesa

With the criteria we mentioned before, we’ve narrowed down a comprehensive list of the best singles bars in Mesa that are actually worth your time. These drinking establishments offer the best chances for single people in Mesa to meet up, have a refreshing drink (or three), and enjoy a comfortable environment that’s compatible with meeting someone new:

From choosing a weekday vs a weeknight, whether there’s live entertainment or other factors, your mileage will vary when selecting the right bar atmosphere. Therefore, don’t be afraid to try a place several times to figure out the best times to go. (If you have any suggestions about the best singles bars in Mesa, drop a comment below.)

A few other great places to find a date in Mesa

Friends chatting at Buddha's Brew Coffee Cafe Mesa

Not into bars and drinking? If that’s the case, there are plenty of options for finding a date in Mesa that don’t rely on getting tipsy so much - even during Mesa’s scorching months and or chillier winter months.

Take a look at a few more options below that have gotten great results for Mesa singles. As with anything dating-related in the city, it helps to search in as many places as possible while not taking things too seriously. Instead, focus on having a good time when you’re out and about. With this positive outlook, you’re more likely to find someone that you might not have run into elsewhere!

  • Buddha's Brew Coffee Cafe in Reed Park - 710 E Main St, Mesa, AZ 85203
  • Black Rock Coffee Bar in Reed Park - 1132 S Gilbert Rd, Mesa, AZ 85204
  • The Organic Bean Café in Downtown Mesa - 40 N Macdonald, Mesa, AZ 85201
  • Jarrod's Coffee, Tea, & Gallery in Downtown Mesa - 154 W Main St, Mesa, AZ 85201
  • Main Street Harvest, AJ’s Fine Foods, or Trader Joe’s are great choices to find attractive people in Mesa shopping upscale and organic!
  • Meetup groups - There are tons of groups throughout Mesa and the surrounding area that are full of enthusiastic singles looking to share their interests and even offer mixer events for finding your next soulmate
  • Again, dating apps and dating sites are great options for finding just about anyone (check out the best dating sites in Mesa here)

The Apps Dating Coaches Recommend Most For Dating in Mesa

Beyond Ages makes it a point to help you find a date in a way that’s balanced and practical. If going out on weekends isn’t practical for you, the best way to meet lots of single women is by using the dating apps they enjoy. Here are the dating apps that are always full of women.

SiteOur ExperienceOur RatingFree Trial Link
Best For Relationships
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • Easily the best option for long-term relationships
  • 75% of all online marriages start here
  • 70% of users meet their spouse within a year
  • In-depth signup and matching process
Try eHarmony
Best For Casual Fun
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • The best way to meet women for casual relationships
  • Best results for regular guys
  • Over 60 million active members
  • Not good for long-term relationships
Try AFF For Free
Great If You're Handsome
Tinder Highlights
Tinder Highlights
  • Great if you're pretty good looking
  • Very popular, especially if you're 18-22
  • Really focused on photos
  • Becoming more of a dating than hookup app
Try Tinder

What about speed dating in Mesa

Enjoying hot drinks from Black Rock Coffee Bar Mesa in winter

Speed dating in Mesa has gained popularity ever since the start of the pandemic. With virtual speed dating now also an option as well as the option for traditional in-person events, speed dating can help you meet a lot of available singles that don’t have time to hit up the bar scene.

If you're short on free time and have a little spare cash on hand, speed dating in Mesa is hands-down the most time-efficient way to meet dozens of single people in the space of an hour-plus. Events typically cost anywhere from $30 - $100+ to attend, with the pricier events yielding better clientele and more amenities. You’re paying for access, so you’ll at least know you gave each potential date a fair chance.

Most speed dating events in Mesa follow the series of steps:

  • First, pre register online. You’ll receive a list of guidelines for the event, including a code of conduct and what you should expect
  • On the day of the event, you show up at the venue and check-in. Many bars rent out rooms for speed dating events, so you can expect a bit of privacy in a comfortable setting.
  • With everyone arriving and getting comfortable, the host makes a short announcement about the rules of conduct and starts the process of "mini-dates" each lasting approximately 5 minutes, where participants make conversation. The idea is that first-impressions tend to be a good indicator of whether there’s any chemistry for compatibility. (Don’t worry if you don’t get a positive reaction each time; you’re going to experience some incompatibility!).
  • Once 5 minutes is over, a bell sounds indicating the men to move to the next table where a woman remains seated (sometimes women swap seats just so they don’t get tired). As the event progresses, both participants make a list of the people they want to see again.
  • This process repeats until everyone gets a chance to meet one another.

As the event progresses, both participants make a list of the people they want to see again. If both singles want to see each other again, the speed dating organizer gives you the other match’s contact info (usually by the next day). Simple, no?

If this sounds like a fun, efficient way to meet available singles in Mesa, the following the best Mesa speed dating groups where you’ll get REAL results:

Now that we’ve covered the essentials about finding a date, let's jump into how to have a great date in Mesa!

Our Best Date Ideas in Mesa - and Why They’re Great

An art class at Mesa Arts Center

After you've set up a time for a date or just want to pitch some ideas to gauge their interest, it’s time to plan what you’re going to do together (or discover why you’re not compatible). Many people who feel they want a safe choice when dealing with a new person in their life often default to the supposedly tried-and-true “dinner and a movie”. This is absolutely a huge mistake for dating successfully in Mesa!

Why? Consider the following:

  • A dinner date between two relative strangers often turns into a pseudo-interview - even for the best conversationalists. Also, eating a big meal and sitting down makes people lethargic, and don’t even get us started on what happens when it’s time to decide who has to pay when the check comes!
  • Watching a movie is a passive activity and doesn’t involve any conversation until afterward (if the movie is actually anything worth talking about). You’ll have to sit still for 90 minutes or more, which can be an awkward period of time if both of you don’t feel comfortable with one another yet. And if the movie stinks or one person doesn’t enjoy it, it’ll feel like a waste of time.

Instead, we have some simple rules that you can follow to increase the success of your date. A great date idea in Mesa tends to be one that:

  • Doesn’t require traveling far distances across town or between venues
  • Focuses on new, fun, and interesting experiences
  • Things are happening around you that make great conversation topics
  • Doesn't involve sitting for prolonged periods of time
  • Requires some physical activity or movement
  • Isn't too expensive or requires expensive equipment to participate
  • Doesn't last for hours (you can bail if things aren’t working out)
  • Enables you both to feel completely at ease and comfortable
  • Involves a little friendly competition

H apps promo

Here’s a tip for dating success in Mesa: Start by getting an idea of what your date is into beforehand. For example, if you know your date loves some physical activity, going on a bike ride is most likely a solid choice.

Also, remember to keep an open mind and do things that can potentially create a positive shared experience (plus you can joke about it later if something goes awry). To get started, here are some great dating ideas in Mesa:

  • Strap on your skates and go ice skating
  • Have fun with a few competitive rounds of miniature golf
  • Cut a rug at a beginner’s group dance class
  • Work on your skills at an archery range
  • Work on your golf swing at a driving range
  • Hit up the wildlife refuge or zoo
  • Check out a street fair during the warmer months
  • Explore the many booths at a local farmer's market
  • Try your hand at ax throwing
  • Test your quick-thinking skills in an escape room
  • Go rollerskating to show off your moves
  • Bring your dog along for a walk
  • Take a painting or drawing class
  • Explore museums and botanical gardens

Use this list to plan a date in Mesa or get an understanding of what other singles in Mesa are actually doing on their dates. Every listed activity only requires a minimal bit of effort and athleticism to enjoy (and is low-cost, too), so there’s basically no pressure to be good at any of them. Instead, just focus on having the best time possible with your date!

The first date idea that we always recommend

The ideas above can be great first dates but we have a better idea. When people ask our team what the best first date in Mesa is we always tell them the same thing, meet up at a laid-back lounge or coffee shop and get to know each other a bit.

A full-blown date is a lot of pressure and isn't cheap. It takes time to plan and might involve you taking a bus around town to get there. Before you make that kind of investment you want to know that you and your interest have at least some level of compatibility. The last thing you want is to get stuck for hours on a date that you knew 10 minutes in, wasn't going anywhere.

Instead, tell them that you're really busy but would love to meet up for a drink to get to know each other a bit. If things go well you can always extend the date to one of the activities above. If it doesn't, you haven't lost much. This also takes a lot of pressure off both of you so you can both relax and be yourselves.

Best Date Bars in Mesa (Especially for Fun First Dates)

A row of games at StarFighters Arcade Mesa

Mesa has one of the best bar scenes in the US (even when you compare it to nearby Phoenix). Offering something for everyone, choosing a bar in Mesa is an obvious choice for a fun and memorable date. Whether you want to spend some time in a hipster lounge or enjoy a pint in a beerhall setting, Mesa’s bar scene offers plenty when it comes to planning your next date.

With this in mind, finding a great date bar in Mesa simply comes down to what type of night you’re looking to have. Take a look at the list below, as we’ll focus on Mesa bars with the best drink specials, live events, and more:

Mesa’s incredible bar scene means that you’ll find plenty of drinking establishments grouped together and within a short walk of one another. If you want to find a different vibe to shake things up, don’t be afraid to bar hop or take a Lyft/Uber to another happening neighborhood. Your date will love going on a spontaneous adventure!

Best Date Night Restaurants in Mesa that Should Be Your First Choice

Date night at Rodizio Grill Mesa

Wanna learn a secret for dating success in Mesa? Avoid traditional “dinner dates” until you’ve actually had a few successful dates (casual meals are fine, btw).

As mentioned above in this article, dinner dates have the unfortunate potential to be pretty dull, formulaic, and uninspiring. Plus, there’s always the dicey issue of who pays for the check - something you probably want to avoid until you get to know each other.

Nevertheless, if you are already having a blast and want to cap the evening off with a meal, we've got some solid restaurant choices in Mesa that offer great ambiance and affordable plates to enhance your time together:

H apps promo

More Date Spots in Mesa We Love

You probably know that modern dating involves more than just eating some food, sipping on drinks, and engaging in witty banter (though that’s all great from time to time). In actuality, successful dating in Mesa involves actively enjoying one another’s company in the amenities the city has to offer.

Based on our personal experiences and in-depth research, singles in Mesa have had great dates at the following date spots in Mesa - and we're confident you can enjoy the same results:

Note: Because of Mesa’s desert climate, take a look at weather forecasts several days and hours before plotting your next date. No one likes getting heat stroke and sunburnt on their next date, nor do they enjoy shivering in cooler temperatures - and bad weather can certainly ruin a date, especially with a new person.

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