For starters, telling a girl you like her over text may seem like a principle that shouldn’t be overlooked. While you may have good intentions, it’s almost never a good idea to do so.
You are actually more likely to lower her attraction for you than you are to spike it by telling a girl you like her over text. There are a few reasons why telling a girl you like her over text message is a bad idea.
If this is something you’ve done before, read on and find out why you should never do it again if you want to increase your dating success.
The five biggest reasons you should avoid this:
If she’s an attractive woman, she will have the attention of many guys.
Many of those guys will be boring to her, because they will fail to differentiate themselves.
If you want to make a similar impression on her, do the exact same thing they do.
Complimenting her appearance or telling her you like her too early (especially when it’s over text) is the norm.
She expects it because it has happened to her time and time again.
As such, it’s way too common.
If you repeat the same behavior that she’s experienced dozens if not hundreds of times, she will put you in the same category as the other guys, whether she consciously realizes it or not.
Additionally, it’s not that you can’t make mistakes.
In fact it’s practically a guarantee that you will make some minor errors as you go about taking her out on a date.
And that’s okay.
But avoid making this mistake.
Don’t do the exact same thing the other guys do (unsuccessfully).
Take a moment to consider if there are any good reasons why you should tell her you like her early on.
Why should you show her affection when you haven’t even met yet?
Some guys may think that it’s a good idea because it lets the girl know that they care.
Well, until she meets you and starts to become infatuated with you, she couldn’t care less about your feelings.
Make no mistake; there is a time and place to let her know how you feel about her.
However, that time will never be early, and the place will never be over text message.
There’s no need to rush it.
As you will learn by the end of this discussion, it can only hurt you to do it too soon–and it can only benefit you to wait for the right moment.
Make her wait for it.
More importantly, make her earn it, because it will have a powerful effect when you do finally tell her you like her.
As for the right moment?
It’s hard to pinpoint exactly.
But as a rule of thumb, only tell her you like her in person and after she’s told you she likes you already.
Dangle a string in front of a cat and it gets excited at the opportunity to play a game.
Give it the string without a challenge, and while the cat may be temporarily satisfied, in an instant it will get bored and move on.
The same principle applies to dating.
Telling a girl you like her over text simply makes it too easy for her.
You remove any sort of challenge she would have to partake in to find out if you truly like her.
She wants to unveil your mysteries–it’s a fun process for her that she will willingly take part in.
There’s no need to interrupt her by telling her how you feel right away.
Let her wonder about you and put the pieces together about who you are in real life. Don’t solve the puzzle for her.
Dangle that string in front of her, but don’t let her grab on to it just yet. Don’t be afraid to tease her–dating is a game, so have fun with it.
We just touched upon the idea of maintaining your mystery as you talk to each other over text.
If she’s receptive to your messages, she will inevitably wonder about what you are like in person.
Her imagination will run wild.
She will draw conclusions about you–some good and some bad.
This is a good thing, because by doing this she will be fostering her interest in you.
If you tell her instantly that you like her, it kills some of the innate curiosity she has about you.
Similar to reason #1, telling a girl you like her over text is simply too common, so she can’t help herself but label you as being just like the other guys.
Obviously that wouldn’t do you any favors.
The final reason why it’s not a good idea to tell her you like her (especially over text) is because it’s not necessary.
As we previously mentioned, telling her how you feel is more likely to do you harm than good.
With that said, we must be clear about something.
There’s nothing wrong in admiring her beauty or recognizing that she’s special in some way.
For now however, just keep it to yourself.
Make her wonder if you’re playing games with her.
Have her believe you may be hard to get.
Allow her to come to her own conclusions about what sort of man you are.
Additionally, it works to your advantage if she gets a little nervous, because you’re not telling her that you like her upfront, as is so often the case.
She will wonder why you’re not seeking her approval.
If you’re able to make her anxious, you’ll attract her that much more, potentially captivating her in the near future.
In short, you can ask her out, have an exciting first date, and create an exciting relationship with her without ever telling her you like her.
You’ll know you’re doing it right when she tells you that she likes you first, and eventually asks you if you like her in return.
Telling a girl you like her over text is a bad idea because: