Take it from me, one of the biggest turning points in your dating life will be when you learn how to get a girl to chase you. It can be a great way to change the dynamic and have her vying for your attention. To apply this effectively, there’s a lot you need to learn. Everything from how long you should wait to ask her out to what exactly it is that girls like in a guy.
Below, I’ll show you what’s needed for this before you even make a move on a girl and explain how to get a girl interested in you. By the end of this article, you won’t have to be chasing after women anymore and instead inspire them to come to you.
How to Stop Chasing Her and Make Her Chase You
If you’ve found yourself in a position where you’re chasing a woman, here are a few tips to start fixing that right now. The longer you wait, the harder it’ll be to fix — wait too long and it might be too late!
Work on your self-confidence
This one will take the longest but it’s also the most important by far. A guy who’s confident in himself knows that he has options and has no reason to chase one person in particular.
If you can start to work on this element for yourself, not only will it help you stop this habit of chasing, it’ll also help your dating life in general since confidence is something everyone finds attractive.
To do this, figure out what it is that’s holding you back and work on a solution. Feel like you should be in better shape? Go for a run or head to the gym. Personal style needs some work? Those new clothes aren’t going to buy themselves.
Sometimes all it takes is a small change to kick start a huge difference.
Don’t focus on just one woman
The easiest way to fall into this trap in the first place is by focusing all your attention on just one person. When you do that, all it takes is for her to start pulling away. Then suddenly, you find yourself begging for her attention. All your eggs are in one basket and they just started drifting away.
You don’t necessarily have to go sleeping around if that’s not your style but at least give yourself a couple of options. It’ll help boost your own confidence even further and reaffirm the fact that you don’t need this one particular person — If it doesn’t work out with her, you can just move on.
Only put your time into women who show interest
An extension of the previous point, pay attention to her level of interest. Figure out if she really likes you before you commit too much energy to her. Like we covered above, if you’re focusing your time on someone and they start to pull away, you’re setting yourself up to go chasing after her.
Modern dating culture means we all have so many options available to us. There really is no reason to go chasing after anyone who doesn’t seem into it.
Why Women Want You To Pursue Them
Here are the main reasons you’ll sometimes have to put in a bit of effort to pursue a woman.
It shows you are genuinely interested in them
If you’re clearly an attractive man with a lot going for you, she’ll want to check you’re genuinely interested in her. She wants to know you're not just after a quick hookup. The more charming you are, the more she’ll suspect that you’re running the same smooth talk on multiple women just like her.
Women want to be more than another notch on a player’s bedpost. So she’ll often play “hard to get” to see whether she’s worth the effort of pursuing.
Women are taught it’s not ladylike to chase guys
Even though dating culture is finally evolving, a lot of women still feel pressure to avoid looking promiscuous. They’re also fed a lot of “girl power” BS that “if he doesn’t pursue you, he’s not worth it” or something to that effect. That’s why some women will never approach a man in a bar.
Some will take this too far and deliberately ignore your messages. So you can definitely know that she’s not a hussie. Even if she shows clear signs that she likes you, this "ladylike" mindset is going to keep her from approaching you.
Yes, it's pretty silly, but there is just as much silly dating advice for women as there is for men.
A lot of women are nervous to move things forward
Some women are really nervous to move things forward with a guy, in case they end up getting hurt or rejected. Some are even more worried about the prospect of actually going on a date. A lot of them stress about not looking pretty enough today, running out of things to say, the date being awkward, etc.
The thing is, beautiful women can ghost a man every time they don’t feel like replying. But they're still overwhelmed with options for men to date. If you’re being ghosted, your best bet is to shoot another message later. Then just hope you catch her on a good day. Just don’t let this turn into triple-texting (remember, we’re not trying to chase her).
How to Get a Girl to Chase You
Getting women to chase you is a pretty complex and deep topic. In this section, we’re going to break it down into some simple, actionable tips for you to work through. These work regardless of the circumstances, from meeting a girl at a party to liking a girl at work.
However, you have to know how to attract women in the first place so you can inspire them to chase you and want you more. We’ve made an in-depth video course that shows you all the specifics of how to do exactly that and get her attracted to you fast. Be sure to check it out if you don’t already have many beautiful women in your life.
Now you've already got a handle on the basics of how to pursue women the right way. Let’s move on to the more complicated matter of learning how to make girls chase you properly. You can't just compliment a girl on her looks and expect her to fall all over you.
Get her thinking about you
The first and arguably most important step in comprehending how to get a girl to chase you is to understand how emotional investment works. Then, figure out a way to use it to your advantage when you’re around women.
Basically, when a girl is emotionally invested in you, you’re always going to be on her mind and building attraction without even talking. You’ll occupy her thoughts and she’ll start feeling various emotions for you even when you’re not around. Every guy wants to know how to flirt with women and spark that attraction but few are asking the real question of how to keep it building when you're not even there.
That’s why when figuring out how to make girls chase you and create sexual tension, you have to leave a huge and positive emotional impact on them when you’re together.
You do this by having fun, flirting and teasing each other verbally and physically. You also want to engage in tons of witty and challenging banter. They can get her high on positive emotions and giddy with joy and excitement. I’ve broken down the specifics on how to flirt with a woman before, so take a peek if you need a refresher.
If you do all this successfully, she'll start missing you and your time together. Now you're becoming even more attractive without doing a thing. How can there be a better way to get a girl than that? This also works really well when you don't want to have to tell a friend you like her but want to build attraction between the two of you first.
When she later has some time to reflect on things, she’ll think back to that awesome date. She’ll start thinking about you and how great you are and how special you make her feel. This will make her wait eagerly for your next meetup because she knows she’ll have such a great time with you.
This will often prompt her to chase you, especially if you’re not texting her every day trying to get her attention. She’ll reach out to you herself to see when you want to meet her again, effectively winning her heart day by day, just through being yourself. . .
Your lifestyle is critical to getting a girl to want you and chase you
It should come as no surprise that women want to be around guys who are fun and make the most of their lives. This goes for girls at the gym, in college at the club and so on. Human beings are wired to seek out and chase those positive feelings.
Of course, the opposite is also very much true. If you don’t enjoy your life, don’t take care of yourself emotionally or physically, have no friends or hobbies; it’ll show in so many ways — from your personality and attitude to the way you communicate. Women will pick up on the subconscious communication and feel your unmistakable negativity. They just won’t give you the time of day.
That’s why it’s important to strive for that self-improvement and boost your own quality of life. Learn new things. Educate yourself. Take care of your body. Get as many new experiences as you can. Develop your skills and your personality. Find hobbies you’re passionate about and share them with others.
Most importantly, make sure you always have goals in life and do your best to achieve them. Be the man with the plan and work your way towards the things you want in life and the things women find attractive in men.
Doing these things will subconsciously tell women you have your life together. So they’ll want to be a part of that. Women start chasing men who they spend a bit of time with and realize they’re fun, interesting, exciting and adventurous. It's a simple recipe for getting a girl to like you but not always easy to pull off.
In truth, it’s not about figuring out specific ways of how to make a girl chase you. It’s about having a lifestyle of continuous growth, improvement and positive change. This draws people in and makes them want to be a part of it.
Making women feel great around you
Like I mentioned earlier, people want to hang out with guys that enjoy life. Guys who know how to seduce women with massive success know that making them feel good is critical.
This doesn’t mean giving out massages to every woman you've been picking up. It means being calm, cool, collected and confident — being true to yourself and genuine to others.
Genuine people don’t go out looking to make everyone love them. They have no ulterior motives and are just looking to live life by their own moral code. They give out compliments because the other person legitimately looks good in that dress or with their new haircut. It's not because they’re desperate to get laid.
By being genuine, you’ll make women feel good around you. That comfort combined with these other tips get them to think about being with you and therefore, to start chasing you.
Get girls to chase you using the abundance mentality
A well-known phenomenon in dating is that men who aren’t desperate as a result of having many other women in their lives are incredibly attractive. These are guys who are constantly working on how to approach a girl and improve their skills in all areas.
Women, just like anyone else, want the best things in life. If they notice other women chasing you, praising you and wanting to be with you, they’ll think you’re the prize to get. As a result, they’ll start chasing you themselves, hoping you’ll show them attention and validation.
I mean, if many other women keep texting you, then it must mean you’re an amazing guy, right?
Well, that’s true, but unfortunately, not many men have lots of women chasing them around.
So how do you show this total lack of desperation and display an abundance of women in your life, even if there isn’t? By displaying specific qualities and doing certain things when you’re talking to women you like and not worrying about silly things like when you should ask her out to avoid rejection.
For example, you have to show you’re not afraid of losing the girl while you’re talking to her. You have to be willing to walk away if she does or says something stupid, hurtful, mean or otherwise bad. Showing you don’t tolerate bullshit and bad behavior.
If you don’t, women will see you’re desperate and that you’d do anything to keep them around. They’ll lose all respect for you and may even start to abuse your desperation for personal gain.
So, don’t be afraid to say the word “No” to women when they ask you something you don’t want to do.
You wouldn’t buy a random stranger a drink, give them flowers or shower them with your affection unless they’ve given you a very good reason to do it, right? So why would you do the same for women? Spend a little time approaching women at any large gym and you'll figure out that 30 seconds after talking to one attractive woman another walks around the corner. There’s no shortage of women, just a shortage of men with the right mentality.
Leadership is vital if you want a girl to chase you
I’m sure you’ve heard the expression that women love a man with a plan. They don't want a guy who is constantly wondering if a woman should make the first move.
It may sound silly but this is actually a very important concept in dating. Guys who are very successful with women know how significant it really is. To illustrate, I’ll give you a great analogy.
Let’s say you’ve paid a lot of money to meet one of your absolute favorite celebrities and have them spend a weekend with you.
When the day finally arrives and you go to their place, you ask them “Hey, so what are we gonna do? What’s the plan?” And they reply with “Oh, I dunno. I didn’t really have anything planned. What do you wanna do?”
Wouldn’t you be absolutely pissed at them? You spent good money, several months’ worth of savings, to come meet them because you wanted to become a part of their awesome life. To experience the amazing things they get up to during the day. And not do your usual thing but with some celebrity dragging along.
You see what I’m getting at? This is exactly how women feel if you don’t have a plan when you’re with them, especially on dates.
They met with you to experience who you are and to see your life, not lead you around in theirs. So take them on an adventure that is you and show them a good time.
From approaching girls in college to women who have a lot more experience, they are attracted to and want to spend time with men who will lead them to new fun, exciting, interesting or even unexpected experiences. In fact, women appreciate leadership greatly even in bed.
Some Techniques for How to Make a Girl Chase You
The above stuff is all part of your own way of attracting women. This means they have everything to do with who you are on the inside. It has nothing to do with techniques and similar things.
That said, you should still know a few practical things on how to get a girl to chase you.
These include flirting techniques like pushing and pulling, banter, roleplaying and similar things.
All of them are awesome at sparking attraction and making sure women have an unforgettable time with you. They also convey that you have a great personality and a sense of humor, aren’t afraid to be challenging, don’t care if you’re going to lose the girl. You’re anything but desperate. Basically, pretty much everything we’ve already discussed above.
To learn how to do all of them and more, I highly recommend you read my other article on how to successfully flirt with women. They’re essential skills to have if you want to understand how to make a girl chase you and then do it with ease.
Now you know exactly how to stop chasing her and make her chase you. It’s mostly about your inner game, various techniques and “moves” come much later.
Make sure to not give women your approval too easily. Then follow the advice above and you’ll quickly see positive results.