It’s a controversial topic, but that’s never stopped us before -- today we’re looking at how to get nudes from a girl. I’m going to give you a few basic guidelines as well as some tips so you can get the best success.
All of this great advice applies equally if you’re trying to figure out how to get nudes from your girlfriend too.
Whether you’re in a relationship or not, it can be a risky game. I’d suggest doing it sparingly. You know what they say though, no risk, no reward.
The reason this topic is so controversial is because of the approach far too many guys take. They think it’s acceptable to message her saying “show me your tits.”
Ever the optimist though, I actually appreciate these guys. Why? They set the bar so incredibly low for the rest of us. A massive part of dating is just demonstrating that you aren’t one of these neanderthals. Everything else is easy.
In fairness, I do see the “pickup artist” trap lead people down this route. They fall into that community because they need help with dating and that community can be vocal. Before long, they’ve forgotten they’re talking to women and are too busy “gaming HBs” (Hot Babes. Gag.) instead.
Some legitimate advice I’ve seen from that community is to demand pics because you’re so alpha. Like she’s doing you a favor. The other gem was to tell her how great another woman’s nudes are and suggest that she couldn’t compete with that anyway.
All of this is to say, stay away from this garbage. She isn’t doing you a favor, demanding nudes won’t work, and she doesn’t want to hear about another woman’s photos.
In fact, if you're not that good at talking to women, you'll have way less luck at getting them to send you some nudes. One of the best ways to improve your skills with women is by taking an in-depth dating course on how to make women more attracted to you.
Now, let’s look at how to approach this with actual women in the real world, shall we?
This is another subject where I really have to start with an important “what not to do.” There’s no way to directly ask her for nude photos without sounding like you’re begging.
Begging is never an attractive look, I assure you. Now that doesn’t mean that you’re going to “game” her for the nudes. Instead, you’re going to create an environment where she wants to send them to you.
Think of it like your most embarrassing secret. If someone walks up to you on the street and demands you tell them, they’re going to seem pretty weird. On the other hand, you’re so much more likely to tell you best friend because you’re comfortable and you trust them.
That’s a key differentiation that brings us to the next point.
As I’ve just pointed out, comfort is a huge part of this. If she isn’t comfortable with you there’s no way she’s going to send you a naked photo of herself.
Building that comfort is as simple as showing her you’re a good guy. Be your strong, confident self, treat her with respect, and the rest will follow. If you can do that, the only other element is time.
As you demonstrate that you’re a good guy and it isn’t just an act, she’ll grow increasingly comfortable around you. No asking for nudes five messages into a Tinder conversation.
This is the other element she needs before she’ll consider sending them. Sending nude photos to someone is a massive leap of faith. There’s no telling where they could end up.
So, make sure you give her a reason to trust you too. Be authentic in your interactions with her. Show her that you aren’t the type to forward them to your friends or post them online, and you’re off to a good start.
Better yet, put yourself out there first. This doesn’t mean sending her a dick pic (please don’t do this!) but allowing yourself to be vulnerable around her.
You don’t have to share anything you aren’t comfortable with, but try showing her an embarrassing photo. Tell her a story that you don’t usually share with others. It’s all about showing that you’re more than just a fuckboy.
Once you have comfort and trust, all that’s left is to set the right mood.
She isn’t going to send you nude photos of herself midway through talking about her paper. Instead, you want to set the tone. Get her in the mood to be sexy and scandalous.
Start slow. Maybe some playful innuendos and see if she’s into it. Otherwise, if you share the right levels of comfort with each other, you can literally tell her you’re turned on thinking about her.
If you’re working out how to get nudes from your girlfriend, this part gets even easier. You already know exactly what she likes.
If she’s somewhere suitable (i.e. not in the middle of dinner with her grandparents) and in the right mood, she’ll play along. You might get a response like, “Oh yeah? What are you thinking about right now?” That’s your green light to explore further.
If you’ve already had sex, you can tell her you’re thinking about your last time together. Get specific about what you liked and what parts of her you’re thinking about right now.
If you haven’t reached that point with her yet, tell her what you’d like to see. “You looked so good in those little shorts last week. I really want to see what’s under them.”
If she’s comfortable, confident and trusting enough, this alone might be enough for her to show you. Other times, it’ll take some more back and forth conversation -- I could think of worse ways to spend my time!
Whatever you do though, don’t ask for photos or make her feel pressured.
Sexting is a fantastic way to get you both in the mood. Lead on from my examples above and tell her exactly what you’d like to do to/with her.
Make sure you escalate slowly and take the time to build a detailed story for her. “I want to take your clothes off and have sex with you” is quite mundane as far as sexting goes.
Instead, describe how you’re going to hold her. How you’re going to kiss her and run your hands down her body, undoing one button at a time. You get the picture.
She’s going to contribute to this story too. The more immersed you both are, the hotter it’ll be and you’ll both end up wanting more. I talked about how to turn a girl on through sexting in more detail a while back. If it’s something you’ve never tried before, check out the article -- you’re missing out!
If she still doesn’t send you photos during sexting (some women don’t, and there’s nothing wrong with that), you can try hinting at it a little. Ask her where she is right now and if she’s touching herself. If she says yes, tell her you really wish you could see that right now.
Something along those lines will usually be enough of a prompt. She’s turned on, she wants you right now, and she wants you to see it.
Make no mistake, she isn’t sending you photos of her naked body to appease you. She’s doing it because it turns her on to know that you think they’re hot.
Think about the countless places on the Internet where women share nude photos and videos for free. They don’t do it for money; they do it because it turns them on to know guys are getting off looking at them.
While those women may be into exhibitionism, most women share this trait to some degree.
This is part of the reason why asking for this kind of thing doesn’t work. If she’s going to send you anything, it’s for her benefit. You’re just some very lucky collateral in the situation.
She’s turned on and has worked up the courage to send you a naked photo of herself. She takes the leap, hoping you like it. You open the message, marking it as “seen” and... go about your day.
Ouch. There’s no greater letdown than being so vulnerable with someone and not getting a response.
If you offer nothing in response or you just reply with a thumbs up emoji, don’t expect to get any more. Instead, if you like the photo(s), let her know!
Don’t reply with white knight-style “omg you’re so gorgeous. I’m so lucky to receive such hot photos!” That’s weird. Just acknowledge that they’re hot and she looks good.
Remember, she sent them because she likes that it turns you on. Make sure you let her know that’s exactly what they’re doing!
The points above cover how to get nudes from any girl, but before I wrap up, there are a few final tips I want to share with you. These are a few common mistakes to avoid so you stand out from the rest.
This one is more about mindset than anything else. She doesn’t owe you naked photos of herself, so don’t go about getting frustrated and shutting her out if you get none.
It takes a lot of confidence and courage to send something like that, so for some women it can just take time.
If you want nude photos right now, I hear Google can show you some websites full of them. If you want them from one woman in particular though, sometimes you just have to be patient.
If you’ve matched on Tinder and been on one date, it’s unlikely she’s going to send you nude photos. Not impossible by any means but very unlikely.
Just keep this in mind as you figure out how to get nudes from a girl. The better you know each other, the higher your chances of success. Don’t go beating yourself up if you’re looking in the wrong places.
As for increasing your chances of finding a woman who wants to hook up with you, check out our review of the best hookup apps and sites. These sites are filled with women who are up for a good time, and that might just include swapping nudes.
This is just a solid piece of advice for every part of life, really. You can be cheeky and test the boundaries with a good sense of humor, but don’t be crass.
The moment you demonstrate that you might be a douche like so many other guys she’s dated, that door is closed.
You don’t have to act like her best friend (in fact, don’t do that. The friend zone is real.), just don’t treat her like an object. Being pushy or acting like she owes you something is a huge turnoff and makes you appear desperate.
A bit of Dutch courage might be what you need to put some of this into practice, but be careful. Mixing alcohol with this can lead to some huge regrets and blown chances.
You might think you’re being clever or funny with your messages, but if you’re 15 beers deep, sober-you might disagree. I’ve seen far too many of my friends make this mistake. Sure, it is something you can recover from, but why not just avoid the problem in the first place?
With this advice, you’ll know just how to get nudes from any girl. For the uninitiated, it can seem like a near-impossible task. Really though, you just need to play your cards right.
Show her the type of person you are, and create the right atmosphere. When you can do both of these effectively, you’re already in with a great chance.