If things go well on your first date, eventually you’re going to have a second one. And if you know how to make an even better impression on her, then you’re very likely to get laid. But what if you don't know what to do on a second date?
Allow me to explain the biggest do’s and don’ts of second encounters. I’ll also give you some great tips about where to go on a second date in general.
These tips will provide you with a great foundation to charm the pants off women when you meet them for the second time.
And if you want to get more first dates, one of the best places to meet women is online. So make sure to check our reviews of the biggest and best online cougar dating sites and apps to avoid scams and get tons of dates.
What to expect on a second date with a woman
Here’s the thing: Knowing what to expect on a second date depends entirely on how the first one went. And the real answer might surprise you because it’s incredibly counter-intuitive. After all, there should be a little window of time before the first and second date.
If you knew what to do on a first date, then it probably went very well and you’ve had tons of fun and then got laid. This means your second one will be much more chill and relaxed because all of the pressure of doing your best will be gone. So there's no reason to be nervous on this date, is there?
You’ll be free to be yourself, get to know her even better and have even more fun together. That’s the perfect recipe for any date, no matter if it’s the first, fifth, or the hundredth!
However, if you’ve hit a snag on your initial date and things didn’t go as planned, you’ll have to do certain things during your next one for your date to fall hard for you. This will usually put you into a state of mind where you’ll think you have to do your best to impress her. This means you won’t be yourself.
So here’s what you can expect, realistically: You can expect to woo her, find the perfect girlfriend or even to sleep with her. This is all fine and dandy but will often wreck your chances with her.
In reality, what you should expect is entirely different: You should expect nothing at all!
Having zero expectations when you’re going on a date will make sure you’ll be able to be in the moment. You’ll enjoy your time with her without trying too hard to impress her. This will erase all of the regular pressure people have on dates, which will make it go that much better.
It's important to mention that knowing how long to wait between a first and second date can be important. You don't want to wait too long but a little anticipation between dates can go a long way.
Here’s what to do on a second date so it goes well
Having expectations for the second date will put you into the wrong state of mind. Now it’s time to tell you what to do on a second date so it goes really well. I’ll also give you an idea of where to go on a second date so it’s not boring for her.
But first, let’s assume your first date didn’t go as you wanted it to, and she still hasn’t made up her mind about you. She’s somewhat attracted to you and thinks you have great potential, which is why she went on a second date with you. But she’s not completely convinced that she wants to sleep with you or date you exclusively.
This is most often the case if you didn’t have a terrific first date. So here’s what you should focus on:
1) Forget about the first date altogether
The first thing you must do on the second date is to forget about the first one completely. This is important regardless of where you met, be it at a coffee shop or using one of the dating apps for meeting older women we love. Don’t even mention it to her or talk about it unless she somehow brings it up.
You see, many guys make the awful mistake of thinking back to their first encounter and trying to analyze things. That includes what you talked about on the first date or whether or not you should have kissed her. This is a huge mistake when they’re already there on the second date and the girl’s right beside them!
Doing this gets them stuck in their heads too much, thinking about what they might have done right or wrong.
This puts them right out of the present moment and prevents them from fully enjoying the presence of their lovely companion. Not to mention it makes them overthink every single decision they make and every syllable they utter. It makes them look indecisive and full of doubt.
That’s very unattractive behavior and women will notice it.
So come to the second date and think of it as a completely fresh start. Don’t dwell on things that may or may not have happened. This will ensure you’re able to be your genuine and charming self. Your date will then enjoy her time with you significantly more.
2) Take her somewhere exciting
When you're thinking about first date ideas, you usually think of something fun and exciting. But that shouldn't be exclusive for the first date. If you doubt you’ll be able to charm and seduce a woman using your wits and conversation skills alone, then this tip is for you.
Instead of going out to get drinks or to a cafe, take her somewhere more fun. Preferably to a place where there’s plenty of action and emotions to go around. Try activities like dancing, bowling, ice skating, an amusement park and so on.
Dates like these are never boring because you’ll both have plenty to do. There will also be many opportunities for playful banter, teasing as well as flirting.
You can also ask her what her favorite activity to do for fun is, and then invite her to do it together. And if you feel comfortable and confident enough, you can even go out to a nightclub.
The point is to go somewhere where you can both pump up your emotions, so happy hormones flood your bodies and you have an unforgettable time together.
Dates like this will also let you touch each other a lot. This will help you get comfortable with one another very quickly.
This combination of getting high on good emotions and lots of physical touching is a great recipe for a successful second date. Even more so if you combine everything with a great sense of humor and your charming personality.
3) Flirt harder and be more physical
If your first date didn’t end with her falling hard for you, chances are high you didn’t flirt with her as much as you should have. And there probably wasn’t enough physical contact between you two.
Please understand, in order for women to want you sexually, you have to behave in a certain way.
First, you have to be physical with her. Because without any physical contact, there is almost zero chance of raw physical attraction to develop. So don’t be afraid to show your physical side, and just do it!
You also have to show your interest in her without making it very obvious. Teasing her, engaging in banter, complimenting her, challenging her and making everything playful yet slightly sexual - these are just a few ways to make her want you.
However, a great number of men make the awful mistake of treating their first date as an interview. They almost completely forget to flirt or engage in the slightest physical contact. This won’t inspire any attraction in women, and it will probably bore her too.
So if you’re guilty of doing something similar, make sure to ramp things up in the flirting department. Think of conversation topics that can turn flirty quickly, not topics that are bland and boring. Make the whole experience exciting, passionate, emotional and maybe a bit sexual.
4) Make an emotional connection
Flirting and having fun with women isn’t enough to have an awesome second date, especially if you are looking for something serious.
If you want to encourage your date to really fall in love with you, then make sure to connect with her on a personal level. Aim for this even more than you did on the first meeting.
This involves asking her about the stuff that’s really important to her, as well as sharing similar things about yourself so she also learns things about you.
If you show sincere interest and maintain a playful and inquisitive tone, she’ll open up to you. Just don’t take things too seriously and don’t make the whole thing awkward. Remember that some of the things you’re asking may be really personal, and she might not trust you yet.
And if she doesn’t open up initially, take the first step and lead by example. Tell her various interesting and really thoughtful stories from your life, and encourage her to share some as well.
The point is to figure out if you’re both compatible with one another. The first date might not reveal much, but the second date is the perfect time to get to know her better.
You want to figure out this stuff as early as possible to make sure you’re not wasting each other’s time. These conversations are often too serious for the first date.
You see, if you’re not compatible with one another, then what’s the point of going on later dates? Sure, you might just want to hook up. If that’s the case, turn up the charm even more!
That brings me to the next point...
5) Kiss her
There’s a lot of debate going on about whether you should kiss the girl on the second date or not.
Well, I believe the second date is the next-best time to kiss her because the absolute best time to kiss her is - surprise surprise - on the first date.
So you should always go for the kiss when you see she’s attracted to you and you get a good opportunity. This is true even if you’re already on the second date. That’s because if she’s agreed to meet you for the second time, she obviously likes you. Otherwise, she’d find excuses not to hang out with you.
So make sure you have fun on your second date, and then go for the kiss when the time is right. If you want to know where you stand with her, this is the best way to do it.
Trust me, if you flirt with her the whole night, take her somewhere exciting and touch her enough, she’ll be ready to kiss you as well.
So after a while, when you see she’s comfortable with you, get close to her. Touch her hair, whisper something sexy in her ear and put your arm around her. Then lean in for the kiss.
Avoid these mistakes on a second date
It’s as important to know what not to do on a second date as it is to know what you should be doing. Because if you do something really stupid or terrible or stupidly terrible, you probably won’t get a third date. So make sure to avoid the following mistakes at all costs:
Don’t take her on the exact same date you did on the first one
If you went out for coffee, don’t do it again. It’ll just show you’re a boring guy with zero imagination.
Avoid gushing about your feelings for her
This is not the time nor the place to do so, and it’s one of the quickest ways to scare women off.
Do not introduce her to friends or family members
You want to get to know each other on a personal level. But she can’t be completely honest with you and reveal her true self if your friends or family are around.
Don’t suddenly change
Don’t do a 180 and change your personality drastically. So if you were behaving one way during your first meeting, don’t suddenly act in a completely different way to “spice things up.” This will only weird her out.
Never bring her any gifts
Again, this isn’t the time and place to do so. Save those only for when you’re more or less exclusive. A flower is fine, though.
Do not take her to the movies
Movie dates are okay for much later. The second date should either be filled with fun activities or in-depth conversations. Movies don’t leave much room for that.
Make the second date more exciting than the first, avoid the top mistakes and remove any expectations. Then focus on getting to know each other more and flirting as much as you can.