If you’ve grown out your hair thinking it makes you more attractive, but haven’t exactly had the success you wanted with women, then you might be thinking, “Do girls like guys with long hair?” Is your long hair scaring women away? Or is there something else at play here?
Like most things regarding women and dating, there’s no black-or-white answer to your question. Many factors dictate how well your long hair will be received by women, including:
- Whether or not it’s trendy
- Whether it suits your face type
- Whether it’s attractive to the kinds of women you want
- Whether it moves you closer to your goals in dating or further away from them
In my many years of meeting and dating women, I’ve had periods where I grew out my hair, when I cut it real short, and when I sported a medium-length hairstyle. And you know what I’ve discovered?
Different hairstyles attract different types of women.
In this article, I’ll share with you my experiences and conclusions regarding long hair, as well as some science behind it all. By the end, you’ll have a better idea of whether you should keep or change your hairstyle.
The Psychology of Guys With Long Hair
If you look back at recent history, you’ll notice different eras had different opinions on men with long hair. For instance, in the ’70s, men with long hair were considered unattractive by women, owing to its association with the hippie movement. (Hippie men were seen as weak, lazy, or unmanly.)
Meanwhile, in the ’80s, long hair on men was considered very attractive—mainly because it was associated with manly, edgy rockstars.
So let’s see what this means for you...
Is long hair trendy?
It’s not just the current era that dictates whether long hair looks good or bad on men, but also the culture of the area you’re in. Women in some parts of the world like long hair. Others may like it long but brushed back. Others prefer it tied in a ponytail or bun.
What’s the sentiment in your area right now? It might clue you in on how women really feel about your long locks.
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Does it only suit specific types of men?
The easiest way to answer this question is to look at popular Hollywood examples. You’ll notice that certain actors look much more attractive with long hair, while others look just plain weird in it.
Let’s take Jason Momoa as Exhibit A. We’ve known for a while that he looks better and manlier with long hair, owing to his performances in Game of Thrones and Aquaman. Meanwhile, in times when he sports a shorter haircut, he looks less manly and maybe a little goofy, but more approachable.
It's the opposite with Exhibit B, Zac Efron. He looks best with medium-length hair. In the rare times he made the mistake to grow out his hair, he ended up looking very feminine. It’s all owing to his babyface (and perhaps getting typecast in his role in High School Musical).
So, check your face. Do you look young and boyish? If you do, then you might have the same problem as Zac—long hair may not be doing you any favors, making you look feminine instead of manly. You might be better off with a medium-length hairstyle.
On the other hand, if you have a masculine face, then long hair gives it an extra edge. It’ll make you more attractive to certain kinds of women, but less attractive to others.
And speaking of women...
Do women think long hair is gross?
Again, different types of girls like different types of men's hairstyles. If you’re not attracting the types of women you like, maybe it’s because your hairstyle isn’t all that attractive to them?
In my experience, I had almost equal thirds of success with women when I had long hair, short hair, and medium-length hair. What I noticed was the types of girls I attracted with my hairstyles:
- In the years I sported a medium-length hairstyle, most of the women that came to me were the “steady” types. These were the regular “girls next door” who were more relationship-minded than hookup-minded. On the whole, though, my hairstyle didn’t exactly make me stand out.
- In the years I had long hair, I tended to attract more “edgy” women. These were the nonconformist types who usually went for alpha and sigma males, and they tended to be more interested in hookups and flings than in dating long-term.
(And in case you need the info: When I had short hair, I tended to attract the same kinds of women and relationships as I did when I had long hair: Edgy with a preference for hookups. The downside? Women kept telling me they “didn’t expect me to be so deep,” which meant short hair made me look less shallow and dumb.)
So do women think long hair is gross? Some do, but that's to be expected. In fact, a study states that women form a negative impression on men with long hair. So if you keep getting comments on how bad your long hair looks, it may be an issue of styling or hygiene—or you’re just unlucky. Actors like Keanu Reeves can pull off the long hair look, but many of the rest of us just look homeless in it.
The important thing to ask is this: Are these the types of women you want to attract? If the answer is “no,” then it doesn’t matter what they think, right?
Why do some men choose to have long hair?
Most men wear their hair like an accessory or decoration—for many, it’s a statement. It’s their attempt to associate themselves with a certain identity, such as:
- The hard, edgy persona of a rock star or actor
- The mysterious, brooding nature of a sigma male
- The calm, peaceful aura of a Yoga practitioner
- The individualist, nonconformist life of an artist
That might have been your inspiration to grow your hair long, as well—you wanted an identity or to make a statement. Unfortunately, as you now know, it can have some unintended consequences.
Do Girls Like Guys With Long Hair?
We’ve learned that the answer is, sadly, “it depends.” Some girls do like guys with long hair, and we have a good idea which ones they are.
Again, the most important variable is this: Your goals for your love life.
Choose: a relationship or hookups?
Are you looking for your next girlfriend, who one day may become your wife? If so, then your long hair might be attracting the wrong kinds of women—the wilder ones who are more interested in hooking up than in settling down.
Worse, the single “girlfriend-material” women out there might see your hair and think: “He looks wild—probably better not waste my time with him.” Oops.
Meanwhile, if you’re playing the game to find hookups, then your long hair should be helping you. If you’re still not attracting enough women, then you might need to go out more and meet more ladies, embracing the “bad boy” vibe your hair gives you.
Choose: steady or "different" girls?
Likewise, it’s good to have a clear idea of the types of women you want to date. Are you looking for steady, regular girls—the ones looking for familiarity, few surprises, and a good, old-fashioned relationship?
If you are, then your long hair might be doing you a disservice. In my experience at least, steady women were much more likely to warm up to me when I had medium-length hair. They tended to treat me with suspicion or uncertainty when I had long hair.
On the other hand, if you’re looking for wilder, “my life my rules” types of women, then your long hair’s just fine. If you’re not meeting enough of them, then you might be looking in the wrong places.
Important: be neat and appropriate
No matter what hairstyle you decide to sport moving forward, remember to be neat. Take care of your hair—have a stylist, practice proper grooming, and learn to style it yourself.
Also, be appropriate. Could it be your long hair is styled in a way that’s not too popular in your area? Perhaps you can try brushing it back, tying it, or letting it hang loose on the sides for a change.
And lastly, don’t forget the other elements of your attractiveness. Continue working on these other areas:
- Building unbreakable confidence
- Remaining mentally level-headed and healthy
- Knowing how to carry a conversation with a woman
- Cultivating a truly interesting life (especially according to women)
- Doing whatever it takes to not be a simp
All in all, your long hairstyle is an asset. It’s a magnet for certain types of women, and it can help you land certain types of relationships. Whether those women and relationships are to your liking is up to you.
That said, your hairstyle is only one item on a list of things you’ll want to get right when playing the dating game. Follow what’s trendy, and wear it in a way that shows you as a strong, confident, capable, sexy man.