When a relationship ends, getting over it takes time. The kindest thing we can do for ourselves in this situation is to move on quickly, but that can be easier said than done. Learning how to get over someone fast is a process well worth the effort.
That’s exactly what we’ll be talking about today. From getting your head in the right place to finding reliable distractions, you’ll be able to put this advice into action now.
Your first instinct after being broken up with may be to disconnect from the world. To fall into a state of hypo-arousal, ultimately shutting off from everything and spiraling into the negative. You might even become obsessed with the idea of making her fall back in love with you.
It’s normal for many, but it’s not at all productive. If for no other reason, put these tips into action for your own benefit. Feeling sad for months on end won’t change the outcome and you deserve to be happy.
This probably isn’t something that comes naturally to you and that’s okay. The thing is, emotions aren’t something to be ashamed of or avoided. We all have them and, after a breakup, we all struggle. Even those who refuse to show it. So if you've accepted that your relationship is truly over, it's time to process your feelings about that.
Giving yourself time to acknowledge these emotions and feel sad is important. It helps you to understand exactly what you’re feeling and why. This is a big part of learning how to get over someone fast.
Give yourself a timeframe to acknowledge these feelings--a couple of days to a week. After that, it’s time to get off the couch, clean yourself up and begin moving on.
You might be tempted to skip this step because you’re “okay,” but I assure you, it’ll only slow down the healing process.
How we feel about ourselves is heavily influenced by how we look. More specifically, by how we see ourselves.
During low points like this, self-care often gets neglected. We’re feeling too sad and lonely to care about taking a shower, shaving or keeping up with the housework.
The unfortunate thing is, this only serves to make us feel even worse. Think about how good you feel when you’ve been eating well, exercising and heading out looking sharp. Now compare that to how you feel after a week of fast food and Netflix. . . which of these do you think is the best environment for getting over a breakup?
Start with a plan to take small steps. Set your alarm for a specific time, have a shower, wash and style your hair and go get a coffee. If that’s all you achieve in day one, that’s perfectly fine.
By this point, you’ve already improved your appearance, had some basic social interaction and gotten some energy. Things are looking up for you. For day two, plan for some more small steps. Keep doing this until you’re back on top of things and feeling better about yourself.
Once you feel better about yourself, your whole outlook may change. You might have more energy or a renewed zest for life. If your goal is to make your ex jealous of your new life, this is one of the first steps.
This means no text messages or phone calls and removing her from your social media for a while. By communicating with her or keeping up with her Instagram, you’re giving yourself constant reminders of the breakup. She might even reach out and ask how you are.
If things are still civil between you, let her know that you need some space for a couple of weeks. After that, be strict about it--no communication at all. You’ll thank yourself later.
However, if you want to get her back after she has moved on, you may want to employ a different strategy. Dealing with your emotions right now should be your priority. After that, you can check out the link above to find out how to get her back.
You probably have a collection of little things around the house that remind you of her. It could be some photos, birthday cards or gifts that she gave you.
Whatever it is, if it reminds you of her, then you need to put it away for now. The more you’re reminded of the relationship and how it ended, the longer it’s going to take to get over the breakup.
Out of sight and out of mind is the best policy here.
What better way to take your mind off your breakup than to go traveling? If you’ve been thinking about a getaway for a while, now is the perfect opportunity.
Invite some friends or fly solo--whatever works for you. The important thing is that you’re putting yourself in a fresh environment for a while, far away from this heartbreak.
Plan some fun and exciting adventures to keep you busy and out of the hotel room. The sunshine and exercise will do you a lot of good.
Picking up something new can be an amazing distraction. It’s another way to take your mind off things while also giving you something to feel good about.
If you pick up a new team sport, you’ll also be meeting new people and building new friendships.
This positive change and expansion of your support network will help you a lot in learning how to get over someone fast. Before long, it’ll feel like that old relationship was a lifetime ago--like you’re a different person.
Chances are, at this point you won’t even want to go back to what you had. You’ll have so many new opportunities presented to you that you see no reason to want her back.
So I mentioned your support network in the previous point and it’s a massive part of our mental wellbeing. Having an effective support network is also critical to making you more resilient, which is ultimately what we’re talking about here.
By staying active within your friend group and keeping these people close, you avoid feelings of isolation. Like you have to deal with the breakup alone because nobody cares.
When you get out of the house and start hanging out with friends, you gain a fresh and positive outlook.
Getting dumped may make you feel inadequate and unimportant, so make sure you spend time around people that can show you otherwise.
Even if you just limit it to dates for the first few weeks, put yourself back out there. Just like spending time with friends, dating will be a huge confidence boost for you.
Surrounding yourself with women who like you and enjoy your company will help you see yourself in a more positive light.
If you’ve been in a relationship for a while and you’re hesitant to enter the dating world, we’ve got you covered. Run through our video dating course to make you excited, confident and prepared to get back out there.
This course gives you a unique system that takes the guesswork out of dating. It’s a fun and exciting process that will teach you how to date in the modern world.
This might feel difficult initially, but every cloud has a silver lining and other such cliches.
No matter how hurt or hopeless you feel right now, I guarantee there are positives as well.
For example, you have the opportunity to work on your dating game. This alone will build your self-confidence and improve the way you interact with people. You also have a lot more free time to work on new things or improve something about yourself if you feel like it.
Your happiness should never depend on anyone’s approval. If you’re struggling to find the positives right now, go ahead and make some. Find changes you can make in your life that make you feel better about yourself.
So much of this process is about maintaining the right mindset. The very fact that you’re reading this article is a big first step. You obviously want to make some positive changes and this is a great place to start.
Work on putting these tips into action immediately and check out the video dating course as well. Even if you don’t plan on dating yet, a big part of the course is about improving your confidence and the way you interact with others. These are both things you’ll definitely benefit from.
With all of this in action, you’ll be over her in no time and back to your usual self.