If you’re still hurting after a recent breakup, it can make you feel a whole range of emotions. Pain, anger, jealousy and frustration are all common to feel in the aftermath. They can also lead you to wonder how to make your ex jealous.
That’s exactly what we’ll be talking about in this article today. After all, that spark of jealousy can sometimes be exactly what it takes to end up back together. Or at least feel a little better.
How to make your ex jealous by improving yourself
Often, others tend to go the spiteful road when it comes to how to make your ex jealous. Instead, we’re going to take the high road.
No fake girlfriends. No going out of your way to make it look like you’re sleeping with women left, right and center. Instead of doing all of that, focus on improving yourself and making her wish she had this version of you. But that doesn’t mean it’s any less effective.
That brings me immediately to point No. 1.
They say the best revenge is to live well. It’s in an effort to get you to move on and be the best version of yourself. It’s easily the top thing to focus on when learning how to make your ex jealous. It's easily the first thing you should do when you know the relationship is over.
It’s unlikely your ex wants you to suffer. But seeing photos of you enjoying life can incite a bit of FOMO from her. Like she’s made a mistake and is missing out on all the fun she could have been having with you.
The best part of this is your life gets better regardless of what else happens. Even if your ex never sees the photos or hears the stories, you’re out there doing you. No moping around the house in your underwear surviving on instant noodles and self-loathing -- that much sodium is bad for a broken heart.
When your life is going well, you’re more likely to end up back in a relationship with someone deserving of you.
This is the best place to start because if you achieve nothing else, life is better for you. Push yourself to get out into the world and enjoy the freedom that comes with being single.
How to make your ex jealous? Get active
An extension of my previous point, this is another step that’s a huge benefit to your quality of life.
Spending time outside and improving your activity levels will do wonders for your mental health. It’ll also see you get into better shape and looking good.
Particularly if you haven’t been all that active recently, you can see a massive change in a short time. You’ll feel great about yourself and want to get outside more and she is definitely going to pay attention.
Nobody wants to see their ex looking hot, right? Get into great shape, show her how good you look and that you’re doing better than ever. She might even fall back in love with you!
As a very welcome side benefit, getting into better shape will inevitably see you attract hotter women too. You don’t need me to tell you how effective this is at making her jealous, right?
Stay active on social media
You’re looking good and you’re out there living your best life. Obviously, you want to share that with the world too, right? Whether she interacts with your posts or not, she’s paying attention. Your ex might even ask how you are.
She might expect that you’re really struggling with the transition. That you rarely leave the house and want nothing more than to get her back. The more she sees these amazing pics of you embracing this new life, the more that jealousy will be felt.
Limit contact with her across all platforms
To avoid those feelings of jealousy yourself, it’s a good idea to steer clear of her social media entirely. It's a great way to get over someone fast. Especially if you’re still feeling hurt, seeing these photos from her won’t feel great.
Despite this obvious fact, sometimes curiosity gets the better of us. If you do find yourself keeping up with her Facebook/Insta/Snapchat, don’t interact with her posts or stories.
No liking her photos or telling her how amazing things are. It’s only going to make it clear to all of your mutual friends that you miss her and need her attention.
To increase those feelings of jealousy even further, keep this same separation across the board. No texting, no phone calls, no catching up with her friends and asking how she’s doing.
Don’t let daily text messages be the norm and don’t keep her up to date with what you’ve been up to.
As she starts to see that you’re doing well, she’ll want to feel like she’s part of that life again. Like she’s missing out on so many exciting things. If she’s the controlling type, being shut out for a while is going to make it even harder for her to handle.
If you need to, be upfront with her. Tell her that you think the two of you need to spend some time apart to figure things out. If the long-term goal is to get her back, taking this initiative and control is really going to help you out there too. But if your goal is to completely get over your breakup, she might just take the hint and leave you alone.
Don’t talk about getting back together
When the two of you are talking, don’t let the conversation go straight back to your relationship. You don't want to immediately discuss getting back together after she has clearly moved on.
Keep it focused on what you’ve both been up to in your separate lives and your future plans. This reaffirms the idea that you aren’t just waiting around for her. You’re moving on and are happy that she is too.
By talking about getting back together, you’re giving the opposite impression. Unfortunately, this makes you look weak and needy, which is just not attractive.
If you spend time together, be positive and happy
If you get to a point where the two of you are spending time together, stay positive. No moping about like you’re struggling to cope with things.
Be the positive, confident guy and take some initiative. Plan some activities for you to do so you don’t end up sitting on the couch talking about feelings.
Head out to some fun places and show her what she’s missing out on. If you’ve picked up a new activity, take her along and show her the types of changes you’ve been making.
Showing her first hand what you’ve been up to demonstrates that it isn’t just a social media facade -- you really have been making big, positive changes.
Keep it classy
As I said in the beginning, when you search for how to make your ex jealous, you’ll come across a lot of cruel advice. Tips that lead you to make her feel bad about herself rather than just sparking a bit of jealousy.
However you choose to go about it, make sure that you stick to the high road. Stay true to yourself and remain the strong, classy guy that you are.
No matter how the relationship ended, treating others poorly is never a good option. If you’d like to get back together again, mistreating her won’t help your chances.
Time for a change in your style
If you’ve been thinking about making some kind of big change for a while, now is the time. Nothing says “I’m doing just fine” like experimenting with new things.
It doesn’t have to be extravagant. This change could be a fresh new wardrobe, a new hairstyle or picking up a new sport. All that matters is that you’re putting out the right message -- that you aren’t just holed up at home waiting for her.
If you’re stuck for ideas around what you can change, let me give you a few pointers.
Time for a new wardrobe
This is such a simple change but one that she’s going to notice. It’ll also help you in your dating efforts too since we can all appreciate someone that’s well dressed.
It doesn’t have to be an expensive venture. Sometimes the most effective styles are also the easiest.
For me, unless we’re going somewhere fancy all I wear is a pair of jeans and a plain, fresh V-neck. Assuming you already own jeans, you can pick up a whole bunch of V-necks for under $100.
If budget allows, freshen it up even more with a new set of shoes and you’re set. A whole new look for under $200.
Personal style and grooming
What better way to compliment your new wardrobe than with a new appearance? Talk to your hairdresser/barber about styles that might work for you and take a risk.
If you’ve been thinking about experimenting with your facial hair, now’s the time for that too. If you’re going to grow it out though, make sure you keep it trimmed! Well-groomed beards are hot. A wild explosion of facial hair on your face. . . not so much.
Get out there and explore the world
Sometimes the best thing for your own mental health is to take a step back from everything. Go on that vacation you’ve been dreaming about and just enjoy life.
You’re young and healthy and any destination you can think of is just a ticket away.
Of course, the added benefit to this is that your ex is going to see what you’re up to. She’ll see that you’re on that vacation the two of you were talking about and having the time of your life.
Feelings of jealousy and FOMO are only natural, meanwhile, you’re doing something positive for yourself.
When most of the advice on a topic is to live your best life, it’s pretty easy to follow, right?
Get out there, enjoy your new single life and just avoid some of the pitfalls I’ve mentioned. When you’re doing this and broadcasting it to the world, those feelings of jealousy from your ex are only natural.
As long as you aren’t being nasty in the process, there are still so many options available to you.