We all want to be nice, sweet and caring toward the one we love and that makes sense. The trouble is, a lot of people Googling “sweet things to say to a girl” are going about it completely wrong.
I’m not going to give you a list of nice things to say to a girl. Instead, what we’ll be talking about is something far more important but still totally on topic: How to talk to girls.
As you’ll see after reading the article, truly sweet things you can say cannot be copy/pasted from the Internet. They need to be genuine and sincere and there’s no way I can convey your feelings toward her!
You know the worst place you could ever get your dating advice and role models from? Hollywood.
See, this article is in response to the massive volume of people searching for sweet things to say to a girl every month. Why? Because your favorite movies and TV shows suggest that it’s what women want.
How many times have you seen that theme in a movie? The ideal “romantic” male lead dropping the perfect line at the perfect time and his female counterpart lapping it up.
The only way that ever works in real life is if what you’re saying suits your style and you actually mean it. Let’s talk about that. There are a lot of things you need to know about talking to a girl and keeping her interested.
Of course, the idea behind this whole concept is great. You want to make her feel special and let her know that you care. Unfortunately though, getting lines from the Internet isn’t how you should approach it.
Instead, just be more aware of how you feel when you’re around here. Pay attention to the things about her that impress you. That right there is exactly the sort of thing you should be voicing.
Maybe it’s the way she handled a difficult situation in the office. Maybe it’s her discipline around study or working out. It might even be the way she tucks her hair behind her ear.
It really doesn’t matter what it is exactly. If you genuinely appreciate it and it gives you that warm feeling inside every time you see it, tell her. It’s that simple! Even the most minor of observations like this are better than a long list of things arbitrary sweet things to say to a girl.
Vulnerability is difficult, especially as men. Many of us, myself included, are raised on the idea that vulnerability is weakness.
That’s a big topic that I won’t delve into here except to say that vulnerability is important in a relationship.
If the two of you are going to grow together and form that strong bond, you need to show her who you really are. Voicing how you feel about her and noticing the little things she doesn’t isn’t “feminine.” It isn’t “weak.” It’s showing an element of vulnerability.
It’s showing just how much you care about her and that you’re willing to put it out there. This will mean a lot more than searching for a phrase to use and dropping it at “the perfect time.”
Remember, Hollywood is garbage. If anything, what the woman wants in those movies isn’t the perfect line at the perfect time. It’s the idea of the man behind it. Remember: it’s you she wants to be with, not a forced attempt to recreate the “romance” you saw on TV.
Quite often the delivery is even more important than the actual words you say. Like everyone, she wants to feel special. Letting her know you’re thinking about her can be all it takes to make her feel that way.
Knowing how to talk to girls is obviously important to dating and relationships. That doesn’t mean it has to be verbal all the time. Send her a text while she’s at work. Leave her a post-it note on the fridge when you head out.
It’s these small things that mean so much more than regurgitating a list of sweet things to say to a girl.
After you've met a woman you're really interested in, a great way to show her that you’re being genuine is to be specific. Rather than “you’re beautiful,” tell her what you like about her exactly. Maybe you love the way she did her hair today. Maybe her eyes look particularly blue. It might even be that you love the way you feel when she does a certain thing.
Again, exactly what it is doesn’t matter as long as it’s genuine. When you’re being this specific, she can see that you’re being completely real with her and that means a lot.
Every single one of us has insecurities. About how we look, what we do, the lifestyle we live, all of it.
As you get to know her, pay attention to the things she seems to be insecure about. Take the time to support and reassure her when these insecurities matter the most.
Again, keep it genuine, but being supportive when she feels at her most vulnerable is a big deal. It could be as simple as reassuring her before that important meeting that she’s going to crush it. That you’ve seen her preparation and how she’s pulled it all together.
A simple reassurance is something we’d all love when we’re feeling insecure, right?
If you’ve found this article via Google, you may have seen some of the other results that show up. Lists of nice things to say to a girl, as though you can just regurgitate an article and have a strong relationship.
What I noticed in these lists is a lot of them seem to put her on a pedestal. There’s a lot of “you’re perfect” and “I could never live without you” lines in there and they aren't as great as you think.
See, it’s going to go one of two ways. If she’s low on self-esteem, telling her she’s perfect is going to be taken as insincere. If she’s genuinely confident and has heard it a lot, “perfect” is a term she’ll hate.
I’ve dated a woman who was gorgeous and came for a rich family and we had a discussion about exactly this topic. About how many guys label her as perfect and it’s too much pressure to conform to.
It’s normal and healthy to love and support her, just don’t put her on a pedestal. This is advice that works for a long-term relationship or if you're really only interested in meeting girls for casual hookups.
Even when they are genuine, several of these comments every day is a bit much. It’ll start to feel forced and insincere which defeats the whole point. Knowing how to talk to girls (or people in general, really) has a lot to do with balance.
It’s great to appreciate her and voice the things you like about her. Randomly giving her a quick compliment can actually be pretty sweet! But continually showering her with compliments every chance you get? She'll probably get overwhelmed, or worse, your sweet comments might lose their meaning.
Have you ever been in a situation where a woman has said something to you and expected you to reciprocate? It’s a little uncomfortable, right?
I have a friend that does this often. She lacks confidence and frequently seeks validation from me. She’ll say something nice to me and when I acknowledge the compliment, I’m immediately in a bad position.
If I arbitrarily offer a compliment in return, it’s forced, insincere and awkward. If I don’t, she’ll call me out on it and literally ask for one.
Trust me when I say it’s unbecoming and you don’t want to put her in the same position. You should be saying these things because you feel them and want her to know. Not because you expect anything at all in return.
I’m sure that by now you can see why a list of sweet things to say to a girl would be completely useless.
Instead, all you have to do is pay attention to her and let her know how you feel. Openly appreciate the things you enjoy about her and she’ll appreciate that so much more than “saying sweet things.”