It's a classic love story. You meet a girl, share some laughs and establish a connection. At the end of the night, the girl gives you her number. Nice work, Casanova! But before you text or call her, make sure you know why she gave you those digits.
That’s because if a girl gives you her number, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s fallen head over heels for you. A girl’s behavior is sometimes complex - she may have given you her number for a reason you haven’t even considered.
In a perfect world, you'd want to ask for clarification to avoid misunderstandings. You might be tempted to ask her if she likes you just to be sure. But most circumstances don’t allow for that without making things awkward.
That’s why it’s up to you to consider the facts and figure out why she gave you a way to contact her. Once you know that, you’ll know how to move forward.
There could be plenty of reasons why you received her digits. And not all of them are going to be to your liking.
The best reason would be because she likes you, enjoys your company and would love to go on a date with you. That’s the ideal outcome.
However, other reasons may include her being too nice or even too drunk to say “no.” She could also want something else from you other than affection, such as your connections or help with something.
In fact, a lot of women will give out their numbers to guys who ask, just to get rid of them quickly. Because it’s pretty standard for a guy to walk away after getting a woman’s digits.
Some women will even give out their numbers without much thought because they’re still undecided about you. Their plan is to take their time and decide later on whether they want to keep in contact with you.
Honestly, it can be a bit confusing at times, especially with women who go clubbing a lot and give out their numbers to dozens of guys every night. That’s why we’ll do our best to help you understand what to do and cover the main reasons why women give out their numbers below.
If a girl gives you her number, there’s something about you she likes. Maybe she thinks you’re funny or cute and wants to get to know you better. Or she sees a potential friendship.
The point is, she likes you and wants to learn more about you. And you’ll know for sure if she likes you over text once you start talking.
Giving away her number as a sign of affection is a longstanding practice with girls. It’s their way of saying “You intrigue me and I want to know why.”
Ideally, she gives you the number without prompting. But even if you ask for it, it’s still an indication of regard and curiosity. Plan on giving her a call or text in the next few days to chat or set up a date.
Another reason you got her number may be because she wants something from you. She may want to network with you or ask for a favor. She might want to borrow something from you or inquire about a mutual acquaintance.
Whatever the reason, she wants to talk to you in the privacy of a confidential phone call. If this is the reason she’s giving you her number, you’ll know.
You two will have brushed over the topic she wants to discuss. She’ll say something like “Let’s talk more about this later” or “give me a call, and we can work out the details.” Fret not; you can still use the opportunity to get to know her a little and find out if she’s open to dating.
Tread with care, so she doesn’t think you’re taking advantage of her or using her acquaintanceship to get laid. Take your time moving from casual conversation to “Are you single?”
Some girls give out their numbers out of simple flattery.
It doesn’t necessarily mean they’re interested in dating you and it doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t. It could be she’s flattered but doesn’t have enough time to decide how she feels about you. She may get bored, pulled away by her friends or have to leave. She may have been flattered and uninterested, but too nice to say “no.” It could be a basic case of being too drunk. There are many situations in which a girl can fall down the flattery slide.
She ends up giving you her number, then decides later how she wants to handle the situation. This is one of the more frequent precursors to not getting an answer when you call. It really is her problem, not yours. If you call and don’t get a response, try not to take it personally. Don’t call more than three times. Leave a message or text. If she wants to talk, she’ll call back.
It may seem obvious, but sometimes a girl will give you her digits because she wants to go on a date with you.
These days, some girls might say, “Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, email or Tweet me.” An older girl will still give you her number. It’s the fastest and most direct way to planning a date, and she knows that.
She saw something in you she likes. She wants to spend more time getting to know you. The next step is to text her suggesting a time and place to meet. You can even ask her to come over if the chemistry is just that strong. Or, you can call her to set up the date. Don’t wait any longer than two or three days.
Another reason why a woman might give her number to you is that she feels pressured.
She may do it out of peer pressure - Her girlfriends are telling her to. Maybe she hasn’t made her mind up, so she gives in to the pressure and hands it over. She might do it out of time pressure - She must leave and can’t make up her mind, so she hands it over.
Or she does it out of coercion from you. Whether you realize it or not, you might be a little pushy. She feels like the only way she can get you to leave her alone is to hand it over. So she does.
She might give you a fake number, or her real number. This scenario is another common precursor to calling and not getting a response. You can avoid it by taking “no” with grace. And if that’s not a problem you face, then don’t take it personally. Leave a message and move on.
Occasionally, women give their numbers to men out of force of habit. This is more common with older girls as they relive the follies of their youth. They get caught up in the moment, enjoying the praise and attention. Before they know it, they’re typing their number into your phone despite having a boyfriend or husband at home. She might even be a player who just likes to stay in touch with cute guys.
Unfortunately, if this happens, you’ll have no idea. The girl could be well-meaning and only later realize she’s made a mistake. She might be honest and fess up when you call, or not answer at all. All you can do is act as you usually would; call, leave a message, and hope she calls back.
Another question you may have is “She gave me her number without me asking, what does it mean?”
Well, in most cases, when a girl gives you her number without you asking, you’ve hit the jackpot. It's basically the equivalent of getting her to ask you out.
Unless there’s a very specific reason she did that, then you can safely assume she likes you and wants to get to know you better. She’s giving you her number so you can call or text her later and possibly set up a date.
Truth be told, it’s pretty rare for women to give out their numbers themselves, without you asking or even mentioning it. A girl might do this if you make a really good impression on her and are just the right type of guy she likes.
When this happens, the ball’s in your court and it’s up to you to decide how you want to move forward. But you’re probably still thinking, “why did she give me her number? I didn’t even ask!”
Of course, there may be an ulterior motive as to why she’s given you her digits. But in most cases, if a woman gives you her number just like that and it’s not because she likes you, she’ll tell you this straight away. To avoid confusion and awkwardness if you call her later thinking she’s fallen head over heels for you.
That said, there are certain exceptions to all this you should keep in mind. Such as when you’re attending college or working at a large company.
Women might give out their numbers there because you’re expected to study or do some projects together. So keep that in mind and don’t assume anything romantic in a professional setting unless you get clear signs of attraction.
Now you know the answer to “Why did she give me her number without me asking?”
The next step is to learn what to do after a girl gives you her number so you have the biggest chance of success with her.
First of all, forget about waiting three days or a week before contacting her and asking her out. Because waiting a certain number of days until asking someone out is terrible advice.
Each girl you meet and each situation is different. That’s why when you get a girl’s number, you must consider the following things: How much she already likes you, how excited she is to meet you and the circumstances of your meeting.
In short, if you notice she already likes you and is very excited to spend time with you, you can call or text her to set up a date the next day. Or even the same day if you’re both up for it.
In fact, you can even ask her something like “Hey, so are you free to meet up later tonight or tomorrow?” after you get her number. And if the timing’s right, she’ll be up for it.
That said, if you don’t see any clear signs of her attraction towards you or if she’s not that excited to meet you, take things a bit slower. Call her or text her in a few days and chat a bit. Show her your sense of humor and have fun with her over the phone. Tease her a bit and give her a glimpse of what a wonderful time she’d have talking with you on a date. And then ask her out.
In most scenarios, if a girl gives you her number the outcome is the same. You wait one or two days, call or text her and await a response. You might get one - you might not. It doesn't matter if you want to ask out a waitress, your classmate or a woman you met at the bar. Chances are the outcome is the same.
Once the ball is in her court, it’s up to her to decide what she wants to do with it. If you don’t hear back in a day or two, you can try contacting her again, but don’t badger her. She’s busy, may have made a mistake or met someone else.
No matter the reason, you’re worth more than sitting around and twiddling your thumbs for a girl. You, Casanova, are on a mission of love.