If you’re one of the many guys who wonder: “why don’t women like me?”, it’s time for a little self-reflection. This topic is massively important if you want to become successful with women.
If you don’t understand why women don’t like you, it’s going to be impossible to better yourself in a way that improves your success with women. In this guide, I’ve listed some of the most common answers to the question of “why do women not like me?” I’ve also included some ideas for how to discover the unique problem that’s holding you back with women.
Keep reading to help you improve your odds of attracting women.
Signs Women Don’t Like Me: Knowing the Signs
A lot of men make the mistake of assuming that women don’t like them before they even talk to them.
They’ll tell themselves “women don’t like me because I’m ugly/fat/bald”, yet men can often overcome their physical limitations with good game and a seductive personality.
So, don’t fall into that trap of believing you’re unattractive to a specific woman without seeing any evidence of that. If you approach a woman believing that she’s going to enjoy your company, that confidence will go a long way.
However, if you often approach women and they regularly show signs of disinterest, that’s a sign you have some improvements to make.
Some common signs of disinterest include: giving one-word answers, tensing up when you try to touch her or making excuses to leave.
This list of signs that women do like you will help. If women aren’t ever showing any of these signs, you know there’s something up.
Why Don’t Women Like Me? The Most Common Reasons
First and foremost, you've got to make sure you're on the right dating sites. The wrong site could be hurting your chances of landing that hot older woman you're looking for. This is why we reviewed a bunch of cougar dating sites to make sure you're in the right spot.
If you're using the right sites and still not finding success, you now have to leave your ego at the door. Because if you’re always asking yourself “Why don’t girls like me?” and refuse to be critical of yourself, you won’t get very far. This includes being socially awkward with women.
So, prepare to take a really good and honest look at yourself with a magnifying glass and drop any notions of being nice about it. You’re here to criticize yourself, not rationalize why you do things and make excuses for yourself.
Next, schedule some alone time so you can be free from any distractions. You can either do this in front of a mirror if you really want to catch those moments when you’re trying to lie to yourself. Or you can take out a piece of paper and sit in front of a desk.
After that, it’s time to get real and ask yourself some very tough but important questions.
The first one can be as simple as “Why don’t women like me?” or "Am I needy?"
Say it out loud and take a long moment to really think about it. Many answers can pop into your head so make sure to write them down right as you think of them. To make a list of potential issues and later go through them one by one.
There can be many different reasons why women may not like you, so let’s cover some of the more important ones.
One of the most common reasons why women won’t give you a chance initially is because you’re not taking care of yourself.
Take a look in the mirror and see if you’d date yourself. If not, think of ways how you can improve that.
Even ugly guys land dates, so trying to change your natural looks isn't realistic or necessary. No matter how ugly you may think you are, women will date men who are well-rounded and know how to make women feel great.
What you can do is make absolutely damn sure you have proper hygiene and don’t smell. Once you've done the basics, make sure you groom yourself properly and maintain a decent haircut. Try to exercise regularly so you’re fit and healthy. Any man can do these things and they’ll do wonders for first impressions.
Desperation is why girls don't like you
Are you being too needy around women? Putting their opinions above your own? Trying to get their attention and validation as much as possible?
If so, then you may just be an insecure and needy person, which is very unattractive and a reason why women don't like you.
I always say desperation reeks like a cheap perfume. It permeates the air around you and if women even get a little whiff of it, you’ll never get a chance with them.
When a guy is desperate for attention, it scares women away instantly. Desperation signals you have nothing good going on and definitely no other women in your life. Women think if other women don't want to be around you, there's probably a good reason for it.
When desperate men are around women, they try their hardest to "make everything perfect." They never disagree or say anything to challenge women. They don't share their own thoughts and opinions because they're afraid to lose the girl.
If that sounds like something you’re doing, then you really need to stop. Because it’s one of the most unattractive ways a man can behave. And it's about time to take a step to stop being needy.
To counteract this, you need to change your mindset. Groom a "Whatever happens, happens" thought process. Go into your interactions without any ulterior motives, just to get to know them. If things work out, great! If they don’t, take rejection like a man and just keep chugging along. There’s plenty of women to go around.
This brings me to the next crucial issue.
Take rejection like a man
One more big reason why girls don’t like you may be an inability to handle rejection the right way.
Rejection is a normal and natural part of life. Literally, everyone gets rejected. There’s no guy in the world who’s immune to it and that’s perfectly fine. Rejection gives you an opportunity to reassess yourself. Figure out what you did wrong and then learn.
A lot of guys get completely pissed when they get rejected. Some even try to lash out at the girl by calling her names and threatening her as a coping mechanism. This is something that nice guys often do.
This will not only completely destroy your chances with the current girl, but it’ll make sure you get rejected more often by others.
That’s because when you get rejected and aren’t able to cope with it as a man should, it poisons you. You start resenting women, little by little, and it really shows in your subsequent interactions. . . Don't be that guy. Instead, learn how to get over your insecurities.
If you’re someone who has a negative attitude, you’re simply not fun to be around.
Guys who have a negative attitude are always complaining and whining about things. In fact, they’re the most likely to ask other people “Why don't women like me?” and get mad when people mention their attitude.
Truth is, no one likes a downer who leeches positive energy and is in a constant negative state. People hate guys who always focus on the things they lack instead of being grateful. Things like women, money, looks, opportunities, etc.
So, if you’re someone who talks about how lame and stupid everything and everyone is, don’t be surprised why girls don't like you. Guys like this need to stop playing the victim and take responsibility for their lives.
Ask yourself another important question: Why do you want to meet and talk with attractive women? What’s your goal?
If your answer is “I just want sex,” or “I want to be loved,” or even “I want to prove something,” then you’re in a lot of trouble.
First of all, this shows you want women just to use them for something.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have sex with attractive women. But if you only want to do it and then leave, or if you want to have sex with ANY attractive woman, you're in for a bad time. Don’t be surprised if women want nothing to do with you if you have this mentality.
Just as with putting someone on a pedestal, you’re completely dehumanizing women with this line of thinking. It shows you don’t give a damn about who they are as people and just want to get something from them.
The answer to this is to start having higher standards. Not just for looks but for the whole package, which includes personality among other things.
Having high standards will not only ensure you actually start getting to know women before you decide to sleep with them. Which incidentally is a very attractive quality in any man. But it’ll also show women you have high self-esteem and know what you want.
Weak body language is one reason why women don't like you
Body language can tell women infinitely more about a man than he could do with his words.
It can certainly be another reason why girls don’t like you. It betrays your inner thoughts and feelings, often ruining your chances before you even approach someone. That’s why developing relaxed, confident and attractive body language is paramount to success with women.
If women see you acting awkwardly, trying to hug them or even kissing them, they’ll be turned off. If you fidget a lot, seem unsure of yourself and look like you’re full of doubt, women will quickly notice through your behavior and body language. Especially if you look like a timid, lost little puppy when you’re talking to them.
Stand up tall, keep your shoulders pushed back a bit and hold your head up. Maintain appropriate eye contact when talking to people and speak with confidence. Doing these basic things will help correct your body language and put you on the right path.
Why Don't Women Like Me? Finding Out the Cause for Yourself
There’s an obvious reason why men wonder “why don’t women like me” for so long. It’s because women aren’t brave enough to be brutally honest with the men they date.
Often, they fear that men could start an argument with them or beg for a second chance. They might even worry about men becoming abusive towards them for sharing truthful criticism.
Also, a lot of women can’t put into words what it is that’s putting them off. For a lot of them, they just feel something is off. For the same reason, a lot of your female friends won’t willingly offer criticism, even if you ask for it.
If you can find a brutally honest female friend to critique the way you come across to women, that could be incredibly useful. Tell them to be completely honest with you because you’re trying to figure out what the problem is. From there, start improving yourself based on their critique, then go talk to more women to see the results.
The problem: not everyone has these brutally honest friends so it’s useful to learn how to do this yourself.
Our video course that walks you through how to meet and attract women is a great place to start. This will teach you all the basics of how to be attractive to women. In most cases, you’ll realize the puzzle pieces that you are missing in your mission to attract a great woman.
Beyond this, you might want to consider hiring a dating coach to observe, evaluate and critique your behaviors around the opposite sex.
Hopefully, with this guidance, you can now stop asking yourself “Why don’t girls like me?” and start doing something about it.
Take the necessary time to reassess your behavior around women and try to identify the biggest issues. Best of luck!