If you’re wondering what to talk about with a girl when texting her before your first date, then I’ll help you out.
I’ll show you some of the best things you can ask her to have a better date. I’ll also mention a few of the biggest mistakes you should avoid when texting women before you meet them.
Texting women before spending much time together can make or break it
You've either found someone while out and about or you've used one of the best cougar dating sites we've reviewed and recommended to get a number. Now that you've gotten an attractive woman’s number, your first goal is to set up a date with her.
You may choose to do that over text or by calling and talking to her. I prefer doing it both ways, depending on who she is and how busy she seems to be. But once you’ve confirmed your date via text, it’s entirely up to you if you want to continue talking to her before you meet. Or if you just want to leave it at that.
Some guys prefer to text before the first date, other’s carry on with their lives until the day of the date arrives. There’s no right or wrong choice here and you should just do what feels right to you.
However, there’s something you should be aware of if you feel like texting: If you don’t play your cards right and you come off as creepy or weird when replying to her "how was your day?" text, she’ll definitely change her mind about meeting you. Because it’s easy to ruin her impression of you and screw everything up. That’s why it’s crucial you know what to talk about with a girl when texting her. But if you don’t know, then I’d suggest you don’t even text her at all. Unless it’s to confirm that she’s still up for the date when the day comes.
Knowing all of this, if you’re still very keen on texting her, make sure to read and understand everything below.
Here are some great reasons to text her before the first date and what to talk about:
You can talk about music
This is one of the most common and best topics for a very good reason. Knowing what type of music someone enjoys can tell you a great deal about that person.
Not only will this help you connect and click better emotionally later on the date. But you’ll also know what topics of conversation to avoid.
For example, if you’re both really into RnB, then you’ll definitely have lots to talk about. But if she’s heavily into Pop and you’re a die-hard rocker who vehemently dislikes popular music, you’ll know that you shouldn’t even touch this subject.
Plus, you can even use this knowledge to your advantage to turn the date heavily in your favor. Because if you happen to love the same music, you can take her to a venue where they play it and have a lot of fun together.
Which makes music one of the best things you can talk about when texting women before meeting them.
You can learn about her hobbies
Just as it is with music, knowing what hobbies someone has can greatly turn the date in your favor. Because if you happen to share similar hobbies or find hers fascinating, then there’s no end to the fun conversations you can have together.
I’m sure if you found out that she shares your love for skiing, painting or even binge-watching TV-shows, then you’re going to have a much better time together.
There’s very little that lets you connect with someone as deeply as sharing similar or same hobbies with that person. So you should definitely find out what hers are and share yours as well.
And if you don’t happen to have any interest in what activities she likes, then don’t worry. You can still talk about them and she’ll appreciate it greatly. Because when you take an interest in another person’s interests, they tend to think highly of you.
Plus, you may even find out about and then potentially try something new in life. Which is always a great thing!
What to talk about with a girl when texting? Travel!
This is an excellent topic to talk about with women when you’re texting them for the first time.
You can ask her about where she’s traveled and talk about where you’ve been as well. And if she hasn’t traveled anywhere at all, you can ask her about where she’d like to go if she had the chance and talk about that.
One of the best questions is to ask where she’d go if money was no object.
Honestly, this is an endless source of great conversation and it’s one of my favorite things to talk about when texting. Because you can take it anywhere you like, your imagination being the only limit.
It presents limitless opportunities to get to know who she is as a person, to flirt with her, tease her and spark massive attraction before your date even begins.
Plus, if you’ve traveled to many places and have seen a lot, then she’ll think you’re an awesome and exciting guy who’s interesting to talk to. Because travel broadens people’s horizons and you’ll usually have many great stories to share.
Joke around and show your sense of humor
This is another wonderful topic to talk about with girls when you’re texting them for the first time after getting their number. Because if you can make women laugh, then you’re already well on your way to having a wonderful date when you later meet.
Basically, if she enjoys your sense of humor, then you’ve already won half the battle. Since a great sense of humor is an immensely attractive character trait and women love a man who can make them laugh.
So, don’t be afraid to joke around, tell a funny story or two or make her laugh in some other way when texting. In fact, I highly encourage you to make it a top priority due to all the benefits.
It’s one of the fastest ways to a woman’s heart, mind and even body. People feel more comfortable and at ease with you if you bring joy and laughter into their lives.
And now that you know what to talk about with a girl when texting, here are the three biggest mistakes you should avoid:
Things to not do when texting early on
For every positive thing that can happen, there are a host of pitfalls if you go overboard. Check out some of the top dating books we've reviewed to get a better idea on what sets women off and how to improve certain aspects. But for the specifics on texting a woman, it usually revolves around coming off creepy or pushy.
While you should always practice a little restraint to ensure you're not getting overbearing, here are a few things that guys do most often. By knowing these issues and paying attention to them, you'll make sure you only come off in a positive light.
Texting too often
When getting an attractive women’s number, many guys can’t seem to fight the urge to not text her incessantly. This can ruin your first date before it even begins.
Contrary to popular belief, if you “shower her with attention,” especially if you aren’t close yet, it’ll usually just scare her off. And this could land a lot of canceled dates.
She’ll either think you’re already obsessed with her before you’ve even had a chance to really get to know her. Or that you don’t have anything worthwhile to do with your time and she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Which will come off as either desperate or very needy.
So, unless you’re really sure that she’s loving every text you’re sending her and wants more, don’t overdo it!
Showing her you’re way too eager
Setting up your date is fine. Telling her you’re looking forward to it is great as well.
But when you’re sending her weird texts like “This is going to be the best day ever! I’m so happy!” Followed by “You’re so beautiful, can’t wait to meet you!” and similar messages, then don’t be surprised when she doesn’t return your enthusiasm.
When you show your over-excitement before the date, many women will think you’re anything but suave. That’s not very attractive so you should avoid seeming too eager unless you’re well past the first date. Otherwise, she’ll think you’re low-status and aren’t used to having beautiful women in your life.
So, sending her over-eager messages is definitely not what to talk about with a girl when texting her before you meet.
Sharing too much information too quickly
This is, by far, the biggest mistake most men make when texting women before and after the first date. They simply share too much information about themselves too quickly, leaving nothing for the date itself.
If you pour out your soul and give your life’s story right off the bat, there’s no mystery left. There’s no excitement left for the woman you’re meeting because she’ll already know nearly everything about you. And she’ll find this out in a dry and passionless way. What’s the point of the date, then?
Remember, you’re not meeting for an interview -- you’re meeting to get to know each other and connect emotionally. That's best done in person and not over text. So save all of that for your meeting.
Now you know what to talk about with a girl when texting her before your first date. You also know what mistakes to avoid if you don’t want to screw things up and end up with no date at all.
Personally, I wouldn’t bother texting women all that much before you meet them. Because the real magic happens in person and that’s what you should focus on.
However, texting before you meet has its advantages. It’s easier to have a smooth date when you find out certain things beforehand about the person you’re meeting. That way you’ll have lots of topics to talk about and it’ll be quicker to connect and click on an emotional level.
Whatever you choose to do, just make sure you leave the most interesting bits for the date itself.