Unless you’ve been living off the grid the last few years, you’ve at least heard of WhatsApp. Maybe you even have it installed and use it to message a few friends.
What you might not know is just how useful it can be for dating. In case the title didn’t give it away, this is a complete guide to WhatsApp sexting. I’ll be covering everything from setting up your account (properly) to how to talk with a girl on WhatsApp. I’ll also go over a few tips and tricks to make you a bit of a power user.
Whether you’re already using one of the great dating apps available or you’re looking to try something new, WhatsApp can help.
In its default form, it’s a lot like regular messaging from your phone. You can send and receive messages, send your location, show or hide read receipts, etc. The thing is, messaging works just fine on our phones -- if that’s all WhatsApp had to offer, it wouldn’t be so successful, right?
The true power of WhatsApp is exactly what this guide is going to cover. Well, that and how to impress a girl on WhatsApp -- that’s what you’re really here for, right?
As a side note, the app is available on several platforms. To keep things simple, I’ll be referring to the iOS version throughout the article. If you’re using a different OS, the steps may be slightly different for you.
Let’s start with a bit of an overview. Just looking at the basics, WhatsApp has a lot going for it:
There are some other nifty bits and pieces but these are the main ones. Not bad for a completely free app, right?
When the plan is to use WhatsApp for dating, think about your profile the same as you would on Tinder. Choose a good picture of yourself, add your name and a bio. WhatsApp makes it very easy to do, so let’s run through the steps right now.
First things first, download WhatsApp from the app store and open it. After you accept the ToS and privacy agreement, it’ll prompt you for access to your contacts.
It isn’t too important for dating but I like the fact that it will automatically add your existing contacts that use the app. You’ll also be asked to allow notifications -- I’d suggest doing this so you don’t miss a message later on.
Once that’s all done, it’s time to add your phone number. You’ll receive a verification code within a few seconds. Enter that and you’re on your way.
Now that the app is installed and set up, it’s time to make your profile ‘you’. You’ll be taken straight to Edit Profile as the next step of the install wizard. Here, you can add your name and a profile photo.
You also get the option to import from Facebook. Unless your FB profile pic is already perfect for Whatsapp (see below), I don’t really think it’s worth it but you do you.
That’s it. You now have WhatsApp installed and ready to use. Before you go any further though, let’s take a look at a few features and options to really get the most out of it.
If you’re anything like me, choosing the right photo for your WhatsApp profile might not be all that intuitive. You have so many options available, which is the best for this app?
It’s normal, especially when it’s an app you’ve never used before. Try to think of it like choosing photos for your Tinder profile -- but you only get one. Alexandria covered how to choose photos for your online dating profiles so I won’t go into it too much here.
Just like your Tinder photos, a quality profile photo plays a big part in learning how to impress a girl on WhatsApp.
The biggest thing to remember is most of the time women will see this photo it’ll be tiny. Once you have a conversation going with them, they’ll see a small thumbnail next to your name in the message list. They’ll also see an even smaller one at the top of your messages.
To get the most out of it this limited view, there are a few extra things to keep in mind:
No group shots:
With such a small space to work with, a photo of you and your buddies isn’t the best choice. It’ll just look like a nondescript group photo and she has no chance of knowing which one you are. There’s no point in a profile photo if she can’t even see you.
From the shoulders up is ideal:
For the same reason, it’s best to avoid those full body photos. Even if you know you look great and it’s an ideal Tinder photo, all she’ll see is the general silhouette of a person.
If it really is your best photo, consider cropping it if the quality is high enough. I would limit it to no more than your rib cage to the top of your head.
I’m all for having a good sense of humor and having a funny pic or two in your Tinder profile can work. When you have just one profile photo to work with though, choose something that shows what you look like.
No Halloween photo of you in your favorite Jason mask. No hilarious pic of that you time you wore a morph suit. In fact, not even a hat or sunglasses if you can avoid it.
Using a photo of your face in your profile only really works if she can see your face!
If dating is your sole use for WhatsApp, think of your bio text as being very similar to writing an effective Tinder bio. Keep it succinct and highlight some key points about you in a creative way.
For most of us though, we’re going to use it for a lot more than just dating. WhatsApp sexting is a lot of fun but we’ll also use it for staying in touch with friends, family, co-workers etc. That makes the bio a bit tougher.
My suggestion here is to just keep it simple. Write a small amount of info that describes you in a nutshell and leave it at that. This way you don’t have to worry about your mom reading about what type of relationship you’re looking for!
While a short and simple bio will only provide women with a glimpse of who you are, it’s enough to identify you.
This is where WhatsApp begins to differentiate itself from a regular messaging app. Very Snapchat-esque, you can add text, take a short video or snap a photo and it will expire after 24 hours.
To access this feature, tap the Status tab in the bottom left corner. At the top, you’ll see your profile photo and “My Status”. If you just want to add a text status, tap the pen symbol on the far right.
If you tap anywhere else on My Status, your camera will launch and you’ll also see your camera roll at the bottom. If you’ve ever used Snapchat, this part will feel very familiar. Tap the big circle to take a photo or hold it to record video. You can even add filters!
Also like Snapchat, regular status updates are a great way to stay current and demonstrate who you are. Showcase the exciting things you get up to, the struggles of that early start or your general mood for today.
It’s not something to be taken too seriously. Have fun with it and get creative. Your status alone won’t land you any dates but it will show her a glimpse of you.
Only contacts saved in your address book can see your status updates. It doesn’t matter if they saved your number, if they aren’t in your address book, they cannot see your status.
By default, all of your contacts can see it but you can limit this if you prefer. Maybe you don’t want mom seeing your uh . . . questionable Friday night antics.
To change your privacy settings, just tap Privacy in the top left corner of the Status screen. From here, you’re given three options:
My Contacts - Share with all of your contacts
My Contacts Except… - Share with your contacts except for people you select
Only Share With… - Only share with selected contacts
Note that your changes to these settings will only apply to any future status. If you’ve posted something you don’t want everyone to see, best to delete it, change your settings and resubmit.
If you want to delete a recent status, it’s simple. From the status window, tap your status, tap “Edit” in the top right corner then tap the circle next to whatever you want to delete. In the bottom right corner, hit the “Delete” button.
Much like a group conversation on Facebook Messenger, WhatsApp allows groups. They’re often used for things like workplaces, universities or any other group of people who need to communicate easily.
These group discussions can be a great way of putting yourself out there and getting to know women. If you’re stuck for how to introduce yourself to a girl on WhatsApp, the group setting makes that much easier too.
Since you’re in a group with them, you already have some kind of shared interest. You also have a valid reason to speak to her and easy access to ongoing communication.
You don’t want to come across as creepy so don’t go saving her number and sending her a private message. Instead, communicate in the group setting and once you’ve established some rapport you can escalate.
For example, if it’s a study group and she’s discussing a topic you’re struggling with, let her know. Tell her that you’ve been stuck on that part and if she seems willing to help you, ask if you can message her directly.
In a group conversation, any person you don’t have in your address book will show up as a phone number. Just like a group iMessage conversation. The difference is if she’s set her profile up, next to her number you’ll also see a tilde (~) and her name.
It might look something like "+1 555 123 4567 ~ Sarah"
You’ll also see a thumbnail of her profile photo so you can be sure it’s the right Sarah.
If you like, you can even create your own group and add contacts to it. From the “Chats” window, select “New Group” from the top right corner and choose the people you want to add. You can also give the group a name so everyone knows what it’s about.
Active group conversations can get messy quickly. Especially if a topic is blowing up while you’re busy.
If you want to reply to a specific message, you can tap and hold on it and a menu will pop up. Select “Reply” from this menu and you can reply directly to it. What the group will see is your response with what looks like a screenshot of the message you’re responding to.
The person who sent that message will also get a notification that you replied to them. Perfect if you’re trying to get her attention in a sea of rapid-fire replies.
Now you’re all set up and you have some active group conversations going. You’ve established a bit of rapport with a woman from one of these groups and things are going well.
The important part here is to keep that conversation going. If you’re both chatting about the subject you’re working on, that’s great. It’s some common ground and valid reason to chat.
That topic will only get you so far that. To avoid ending up an innocuous study buddy, try to broaden the conversation. Talk about your social life a bit and see how she responds.
For example, maybe she complains that she’s struggling to concentrate. You can respond with something like “tell me about it. I think I’m still recovering from Sunday night!”
As with most text conversation in dating, how she responds is going to tell you so much right here. If she just wants to keep it about the university work, she might respond with “oh geez” or “uh-oh”. Something that diffuses the conversation rather than continuing it.
If she’s open to talking about more than just school work, she’s going to keep the topic alive. Maybe something like “tell me about it. I think I can still taste the tequila from Saturday night!”
I wanted to point this one out because a lot of people don’t realize you can send GIFs in WhatsApp. GIFs are such an underrated part of dating in general. In fact, if you catch yourself stressing over how to introduce yourself to a girl on WhatsApp, this can be a great place to start.
Using them is simple. You don’t even need to mess around installing anything. In a message window, just tap the ‘+’ symbol next to the text field at the bottom. Select “Photo & Video Library” then tap “GIF” in the bottom left corner.
I have no idea why they made it so obscure but now you know.
I have a terrible memory, so this is another WhatsApp feature that I love. Once I’ve set up a date with a woman, I’ll ‘star’ that message for later. When you do this, the message gets marked with a star and goes into the “Starred Messages” list for that conversation.
Note that nobody else can see when you’ve done this, it just makes life easier for you.
To see the list of starred messages in that conversation, just tap her name at the top of the message window and select “Starred Messages”. It’ll show you any messages you’ve starred along with a timestamp.
Now if you want to double-check when and where the date was set for, you can check this list instead of scrolling.
Another feature that my goldfish memory loves is just how easy it is to add something to your calendar.
When you propose a date, WhatsApp will underline the date and/or time for you. All you have to do is tap that underlined text and select Create Event.
It isn’t perfect but it does a pretty good job of recognizing this type of thing. You don’t have to be awkward and say, “how about 7:00 pm on Wednesday 27th of April” for this feature to work. Even saying “tomorrow night” is enough. Very handy.
Sometimes you just want to add some emphasis to parts of your message. Used creatively they can be entertaining. This is another place where WhatsApp shines over something like iMessage.
You get three formatting options that are simple to use:
*Bold text goes between asterisks*
_text between underscores will be in italics_
text between two tildes will get a strikethrough~
Use these to your advantage to really highlight something important or add a little humor. Here’s my most recent (albeit silly but that’s my humor) use of a strikethrough for a cheap laugh:
“Sounds good. That place looks fancy, I might have to put on some pants bust out the new blazer for this date!”
Another helpful feature of this app is the fact you can delete messages. When deleting you have two options -- “delete for me” and “delete for everyone”.
They’re pretty self-explanatory. One deletes it from your phone, the other deletes it for everyone in the conversation. You do have to do this within seven minutes of sending it though.
The other thing to be aware of is if you select “delete for everyone”, they’ll see the deletion. They can’t see what you wrote, just that you had sent a message then deleted it from the conversation.
Depending on the situation, sometimes this can raise a lot of suspicions, so use it wisely.
WhatsApp can be a great app for sexting as well. You can send and receive messages on your laptop for easier back and forth. It also allows for GIFs, stickers, photos and video so you have plenty of options available.
Once you’ve reached a point with a woman where it’s appropriate, you just need to take that leap. Start slow, hinting at the topic, in general, to make sure she’s open to it. You don’t want to try sexting while she’s sitting on the couch with her dad, right?
Some playful teasing is often a good way to start and see if she responds in the same way. If she does, let things escalate slowly. Just like real sex, it’s rarely a good idea to jump straight to the end.
Women, even more than men, enjoy the tension and excitement of slow and steady escalation. The better you can get at doing this, the better you’re going to be!
Sexting can be so much fun when you’re both into it. If you’re both comfortable, you can even share photos and test out your fantasies. Who knows, maybe she’s into it too and you’ll get to try it for real sometime!
Learning how to talk with a girl on WhatsApp is about confidence, especially when it comes to sexting. You have to be willing to take that risk, steadily increase the tension and push your boundaries together.
Learning how to project this confidence is a necessary skill in all forms of dating. If you feel like this is an area that could use some work for you, our online dating video course has you covered.
The more confident you are in your sexting, the smoother everything is going to go. She’ll enjoy it more since you’re taking the lead and you get to experiment and see what she’s open to as well.
Being too slow with your responses can kill the mood no matter what medium you’re using. It becomes even more important with WhatsApp sexting. With default settings, she can see when you were last online and when you read her message.
Nothing says sexy quite like sexting between other conversations. If she can see that you’re online the whole time and still taking 10 minutes to reply, things aren’t going to end too well. Ideally, rapid-fire WhatsApp sexting messages are what you’re aiming for.
It means you’re both equally engaged and really into the whole conversation.
Nobody wants to be sexting while they’re having breakfast at 7:00 am. Instead, save it for night time. To be really effective, you can drop hints and slowly build tension throughout the day. Just don’t get too heavy with things until some time after dinner.
She’s more likely to be done with school, work, socializing etc and generally more receptive. That means she’s also got the time to dedicate to the conversation which is a win for you both.
Especially for sexting, it’s important to know how WhatsApp handles photos by default. Any photos that she receives will go straight to her camera roll and, subsequently, iCloud.
If dating multiple women at once is your thing, this can be something to watch out for on your phone too. You don’t want to open Photos to show a date something and be surprised by some racy sexting pics from other women.
Of course, make sure you’re not sending her any unsolicited dick pics either. That shouldn’t require a note but it’s 2019 and ladies still have issues with it.
Sexting is all about taking things slowly, staying confident and knowing when to escalate. But if it’s something you struggle with, make sure you check out my tips on how to be good at sexting.
It can be scary the first couple of times but it’s also a whole lot of fun! Just follow this guide and experiment a bit with your style and you’ll be sexting on WhatsApp quickly.