Are you looking to get back with your ex? Maybe you had an insane connection with a woman who slipped through your fingers. Or perhaps you want to pick up where you left off with a girl you were getting to know. If any of this rings true for you, you’re probably wondering how to get a girl to like you again.
Getting a former love interest to like you again can be challenging. In most cases, relationships end for a reason. It’s possible you had a good reason to part ways, but it’s also possible your breakup doesn’t make much sense. Either way, you’ll have to confront the cause. If the relationship (or almost-relationship) ended on bad terms, you’ll have your work cut out for you. However, not all hope is lost.
Things may have ended over a betrayal, lousy timing, or by things simply fizzling out. Either way, you may be able to fix it if you play your cards right. Unless either of you did something entirely unforgivable, it’s always worth a shot. There’s no harm in trying!
Do you want to know how to get a girl to like you again? These eight steps will help you get the ball rolling.
Do you want your former bae to want you back? The first thing you need to do is give her space. I realize this might seem counterintuitive since the goal is to be with her. But it’s an essential part of the process. It shows her you understand that she may be hurt and that you respect her wishes to spend some time apart. Healing is critical for serious heartache, and moving too quickly to get back together might be counterproductive.
It’s also possible that she’s dating someone new. If so, don’t panic, and don’t sabotage her. Let her explore other options. It’s part of healing. If the two of you are meant to be, you’ll have your chance again. Giving her some room to breathe will show her that you’re selfless and want the best for her.
For some people, taking some time apart means going completely cold-turkey for a few months. For others, it might mean only seeing each other in social settings or texting once in a while. The right way to go about this is subjective, but it won’t hurt if you don’t initiate any contact for a little while.
If you feel like you’re not OK without her, you may want to do a little soul-searching. You should be able to find happiness on your own before you’re ready to be in a relationship. Now’s the time to play it cool and show her you’re not desperate. Plus, it'll leave you time to think about what went wrong, which is crucial for executing some of the next steps. It will also give her the space and a chance to show you that she is still interested in you.
Like I said, you have to be OK with being single before committing to a relationship. To be clear, it’s normal to want to date people and find a girl to enhance your already-awesome life. But if you need a girl in order to be content, you’ll be putting a significant emotional burden on her. Which is unfair.
With that said, you may be able to get a girl to like you again by living your best life. This means becoming more attractive by working on yourself and finding enjoyment on your own. Get some exercise, focus on work, hang out with your friends and engage in some of your favorite hobbies. Grow that sexy beard that girls seem to love. Be a glass-is-half-full guy.
Even if you don’t see her in-person very often (or ever), there’s a good chance she’ll hear of your awesomeness. As a result, she might think you’re doing great without her or that she missed out on a total catch. The idea is to make her see how desirable you are, not that you’re depressed about being alone. From a distance, show her how much fun you’re having. So that she can see how much fun she could be having with you.
Do you see this girl regularly, or would you never run into each other if you didn’t make plans? If it's the latter, humble-bragging on social media is an excellent way to show her what she’s missing.
According to Mirriam-Webster, humble-bragging is defined as “making a seemingly modest or casual statement or reference that is meant to draw attention to one’s admirable or impressive qualities or achievements.”
Imagine her scrolling through Instagram and seeing photos of you having fun, going out, traveling, and killing it at work. It might make her think twice about why things didn’t work out. The keywords here are “modest” and “casual,” so don’t go completely overboard. If you’re clearly overcompensating or posting way more than you normally do, she might be onto you. The goal isn’t to make her jealous. Through sporadic posts, let her see that you’re thriving.
She might like or comment on your posts, and she might not. If she doesn’t, don’t be discouraged. It doesn’t necessarily mean she’s not taking notice––she might just be trying to play it cool, too.
After time has passed and you’ve made it clear that things are good on your end, you can consider reaching out. This could involve a text, a phone call or an email. Ultimately, you’ll want to ask her if she’s interested in meeting up in person to talk.
You might be tempted to lay it all out there before you see her, but I recommend holding your horses. Keep it short and sweet so she’s left wondering if you still like her romantically. If she’s interested in seeing you and hearing what you have to say, she’ll oblige to meeting up.
On the other hand, if she’s over it or dating someone new, she may decline or just ignore you. Unfortunately, this is something you’ll have to prepare for. Remember that she’s not obligated to hear you out, even if you have changed. If she wants to, she will––and you want her to want to see you. Either way, be polite and wish her well. Getting angry or demanding that she see you is not a good look.
If she agrees to meet up, it’s a good sign. The best-case scenario is that she still has feelings for you and wants to get back together. At the very least, she still cares enough about you as a friend to see what you have to say.
This is your in-person chance to show her how great you’re doing. If things got ugly the last time, you can also show her how you’ve changed since you called it quits. Instead of telling her how great you’re doing, show her with your appearance and actions.
Just keep in mind that these changes should be realistic and indicative of who you really are. You want to be a better version of your past self, not a whole new person she can't recognize. It's not a matter of getting surgery or becoming a few inches taller. It's a matter of showing her the new, improved you.
It might go without saying, but make sure you carefully select a clean, ironed outfit and take some time to groom yourself. You want to have an overall spiffed-up look. Also, don’t show up late. You want to be coy, but acting aloof will give the impression that you’re not serious about dating her.
The next step to getting a girl to like you again is to tell her you want to work things out. You might choose to express this the first time you see each other. But it’s OK to take things a little slower, too. However, meeting up with her without clearly stating your intentions might confuse her or make her think you’re messing with her feelings.
If the conversation goes well and you’re feeling a spark, it’s time to approach the subject of resurrecting the romance. As you’re both single, doing well in life and open for dating, there’s a good chance your feelings will be reciprocated.
Did she agree to get back together? Congrats! But you’re not quite out of the woods yet. Your relationship won’t succeed this time if you don’t confront and reflect on what went wrong before.
If it was just bad timing or a missed connection, you’re probably good to go. But if you were actually boyfriend and girlfriend at one point, you have to discuss what will be different now. Whether the downfall was your bad, hers or mutual, you’ll set yourselves up for failure if you don’t reconcile the past.
Were you in the wrong? Own up to it! It’ll show maturity and make her feel like you’re dedicated to making things right.
Now that you know how to get a girl to like you again, you can put these steps to the test. Just remember to be receptive to her feelings and fears moving forward. It’s normal to be apprehensive about reviving a failed romance, whether it was a fling or a serious relationship. Give her time to consider, and come up with a solution to fix what’s broken.
Even if you pull out all the stops, rekindling an old flame is not a guarantee. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth a shot. Be patient, be respectful, and be open to what she wants. You’ll never know if you don’t try!