Whether you’re on a first date or trying to secure one, knowing what to say to make a girl smile is key. But as most guys have learned, it’s not as easy as cracking a joke or bringing out a cheesy pickup line. And besides, you want to elicit a genuine smile. These are the ones that reach all the way up to her eyes. They’re the smiles that tell you, she likes you and you’re on the right track.
So do you know what to say to a girl to make her smile? Let’s find out.
It’s important to know what to say to make a girl smile
Smiling is essential in dating on so many levels. From her perspective, a smile makes her feel good. Even when you’re not happy making yourself smile has proven benefits. And while this is nice, you don’t want her to smile for the sake of it. You want her to feel good about you. And in turn, get her to talk to you.
But from your perspective, a smile can mean so much more. It’s your barometer of success. In a game of dating, a smile means keep going and a frown means brake hard. However, most women are reluctant to frown for fear of being considered grumpy or rude. So really, the smile is all you’ve got to go on.
Let your words show her your sense of humor
It’s no fluke older women regularly place a good sense of humor in their top-three most-important factors in the search for a younger guy. However, most guys misinterpret this as a woman looking for a comedian and jump right in with a gag.
Having a good sense of humor doesn’t mean being able to deliver a stand-up routine. She’s looking for someone who can see the humor in everyday life, who doesn’t take themselves or experiences too seriously. She’s essentially looking for an optimist that can make situations funny and make her laugh about them.
Being amusing is easy. All you have to do is make observational comments without being cruel or rude. When your restaurant meal arrives cold say, “Looks like someone forgot to turn the oven on.” Don’t say, “Looks like someone graduated top place from The Idiot University.”
This tactic can also be used to start a conversation with a girl you like. When you catch someone’s eye waiting in line at the Post Office, say, “Maybe it would be quicker if I just took it myself.” And if you get a flicker of recognition, “May I offer to take yours too?”
It’s no mistake there’s a ‘good’ in good sense of humor. Women don’t like spiteful comedy.
Part or being amusing includes being light-hearted.
Being light-hearted around her is relaxing and when a woman is relaxed, she’s more likely to smile. If she’s nervous, you can tell the funniest joke in the world and she’s not going to crack a smile. She might laugh out loud or grimace, but that’s not the same as a smile.
The secret to being light-hearted is to be cool, calm and prepared. If you’re on a date and you get to the restaurant only to find they’ve lost your reservation, it’s no problem. You’ve got a backup plan!
“No worries, there’s a new place that just opened up down the street. Let’s go take a look there.”
This is an example of how to turn a bad situation into a win and what to say to a woman to make her melt.
Talk and act like a gentleman
This one sounds easier than it really is. Most guys think being a gentleman means opening doors and pushing in chairs but it’s so much more. Of the utmost importance is your conversation and knowing what girls like to talk about. A gentleman knows what to say to a girl to make her smile.
The principal thing to remember is on your date she comes first. A lot of younger men think the date is all about impressing her – and it is. But if you want to impress her, concentrate on her, not you.
This means if your phone rings, you never say, “Let me just get this real quick.” You’re asking your date to sit there like a lemon while you focus on someone else. She’s not a robot you can put on standby until you’re ready to play again. When your phone rings, you say, “I’m so sorry. I must have forgotten to turn that off. How rude of me.”
This might make it sound like turning your phone off is part of being a gentleman, but it’s not. Leaving it on once gives you an opportunity to show her you know the rules. Saying, “I’m sorry”, for a small offense is extremely polite.
Again, this is an example of turning a bad situation into a good one. Knowing what to say to a woman to make her melt can be off the cuff and comforting.
Give her an honest compliment
In the last few years, younger guys seem to have lost the art of giving a girl a compliment. In turn, younger women have lost the art of receiving one. But if you’re dating older women, you may find your compliments are truly appreciated. However, giving a compliment is a serious undertaking.
First of all, it needs to be genuine. This means when you notice something about her and you admire it, this is what you need to compliment.
Clearly, you need to stay away from complimenting anywhere covered by her clothes. And certain body parts like knees and elbows won’t generate much of a smile. But anywhere on her face is a clear winner ,as are her hands.
This is because her hands and face move and express her personality. Complimenting her ‘sparkling eyes’, ‘captivating smile’ or ‘delicate hands’ feels personal to her.
Stay away from talking about her hair, unless it’s clearly all her own length and color. No older woman wants to receive a compliment aimed at her stylist. There’s just far too many pitfalls where things can go wrong to lean on this.
Have conversational topics prepared
If you’ve ever watched a reality dating TV show, you’ll have probably heard the guys say pretty corny stuff. You’ve likely seen them still get a smile too.
This is because the episode only shows you the key parts and use editing to tell a story. They very well could have edited a smile from another part of the date on to that lame joke to make the date seem better.
These shows are cut for time and privacy as well. If you could see the whole date, you’d see the producers feed the contestants topic. And just like those guys, having key topics ready is crucial to know what to say to a girl to make her smile.
In online dating, much the information we have before a date is biometric and static. Aside from a small personal statement, there’s not much room for charm. Your first few dates are your chance to build rapport and secure some smiles.
The way to do this is with genuine, truthful anecdotes which give her a chance to respond and add her own experiences.
These might be things like when you adopted your dog from the pound, a vacation you took, a funny mishap at work, or a story about helping out a relative or neighbor. She might have a similar story to tell and then you can respond with, “Ah-ha, that reminds me of the time when I . . .”
Ask her questions to get to know her better
This is the most wonderful and easiest route to getting a smile out of a girl. Best of all, it’s one where she does most of the talking. Almost everyone likes to feel special and the center of attention. Asking someone questions does just this. You can use these questions to talk to a girl in a bar, for example.
But the questions you ask need to be well thought out. Knowing what to say to make a girl smile is also about knowing what things to avoid. You also need to know how to steer around dead-end subjects and closed questions.
Closed questions are those, which can be easily answered with a yes or a no. For example, “Do you like pizza”, “Have you ever been to LA?” or “Can you ski?” These are all closed questions. Once you’ve asked and she’s answered, you’ll need a new question.
“What was the best part of your day?”, “Who is your favorite Disney baddie?” or “What skill do you wish you had?” are conversation starters. They’re the type of questions which could make her smile and open up a little to you.
Say thank you
While you should be saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ automatically, this one comes at the end of the date. And it’s more than just a simple thank you.
If you like a woman and you ask her out and she agrees – and doesn’t stand you up – she’s taking a risk on you. Whether you’re paying for dinner or the two of you are going Dutch, or if it’s just one drink, she’s placing herself at your mercy.
No woman says “yes” to a date lightly. She must figure out ahead of time if you’re going to be polite to her, respectful and make her feel safe. She would also like to enjoy the time she spends with you and not have to wonder when she can politely leave.
So even if you’ve been the funniest, most complimentary and light-hearted date, you still need to recognize the trust she placed in you. So if you really want to know what to say to a woman to make her melt, it’s “thank you.” If you say it truthfully and with enough integrity, it will make securing a second date much easier.