If you want to meet women who like older men, I have some excellent news for you: It’s quite common and they aren’t hard to find.
Even better than that, they’re typically going to come to you. You’ll notice a lot of similarities between meeting a cougar and meeting women who like older men. Why? Because it’s the same dynamic but flipped -- now you’re the cougar and these young women are looking for you.
In recent years I’ve found myself being around a number of women around 10 years younger than me. Not only do I have firsthand experience with the topic but I also discussed this article with some them before writing it. You’re getting the best of both worlds here.
Where we meet women who like older men online
While our video on where you can meet older women points to a number of local spots, online might be the best place for you. You’ll know the women are interested and you can meet and talk with many at once. So we’re going to spend some time covering our favorite sites first.
1) eHarmony is the best option if you are looking for more of a relationship
When it comes to finding women that are looking for something real that will last eHarmony is by far the best option right now. Women don't look for older guys on apps like Tinder, they go to the option that has had the best results connecting people for the long-term. Over 75% of all marriages that began online were on eHarmony and it tends to draw girls who want a relationship.
You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how many younger women are on eHarmony and how many are looking for a legitimate relationship. With over 30 million members, it's has topped our list of the best dating sites and dating apps for the last four years.
Simply put, your best chance of finding a woman looking for an older man is going to be here. And with eHarmony's trial offer, there’s no reason to not give it a try.
But if you’re just looking for some short-term fun, we’ve got you covered with our next option.
2) AFF is great if you just want to head to the bedroom
With over 90 million active users, AFF undoubtedly has someone for you. They’ve been around for well over a decade at this point and are the best in the game for finding hookups. With such a large user base, you’ll likely find a few women looking for older men for a long-term relationship but they’ll be a minority.
After trying out over 100 different apps and sites AFF has routinely shown up at the top of our list of the best hookup apps for a good reason.
Simple and easy to use, it’s another option worth checking out. Sign up for a free trial, create your profile and you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about.
Where to meet women who like older men locally
If online dating isn’t your thing, don’t fret. You can still find lovely women interested in you in your own back yard. These six local spots are places you might want to spend a little more time around if you’re looking for women who like older men.
1) Classy bars
Bars are always a good bet when looking for love. It might be a trope but it’s only because it absolutely works still. All you have to do is vibe with someone and get some numbers.
But let’s get a little more specific because not all bars are created equal.
Sure, you could go to your local college bar and find dozens of half-drunk young women but you’ll stand out like a sore thumb. And not in the right way.
Instead, focus on higher-end bars. Wine and cocktail bars are perfect for this. They tend to have a more sophisticated clientele. While there might not be as many younger women in the room, the ones that are there will be more likely interested in an older man.
In a bar like this, it’s not weird for you to buy someone a drink. She isn’t going to feel unsafe or creeped out by that well-dressed older man buying her a cocktail. It’s completely different to being offered a cheap beer by a slurring 22-year-old while his buddies gawk in the background. It's also super common to find women who make the first move here. But only if you're lucky.
When I asked one of my female friends where she meets men, she let me in on a little secret:
“...girls go to fancier places to be seen and low-key places to hang out. Key difference.”
In other words, she’s in a place like that because she wants to be seen. She welcomes interaction. If she’s at the local dive bar with her friends, she’s just there to be with her friends. Keep this in mind the next time you sit down with that Old Fashioned.
2) The dog park
If you’ve ever walked a cute dog down the street, there’s a pretty good chance people have stopped to pet it. More often than not, it’ll be women doing it. It’s such a great way to start a conversation with women without having to do any of the hard work.
To help your chances of picking up women, head to the local dog park. Rather than relying on luck to come across women, you’ll be surrounded by other pet owners. Whether they come over to pet your dog or you strike up a conversation while your dog gets some exercise, it’ll feel totally normal and relaxed.
There’s no shortage of conversation topics immediately in front of you. If you get stuck, just ask which dog is hers. Or, if the answer is obvious, ask her what breed and go from there.
If she’s at the dog park with her pet, she obviously loves dogs so it’s a clear point for you to relate to immediately. If you visit the same park often, you’ll even start to see the same women over and over.
Get into the habit of chatting to people while you’re there (both men and women) and the rest will come naturally.
3) Tourist hotspots
When people are on vacation, they’re more relaxed and open to social interaction. If you live near some major tourist hotspots, it’s worth heading there every now and then to check it out -- particularly if that area attracts a lot of people from overseas.
Being a local is interesting enough in itself and puts you in a prime position to offer some local knowledge. Offer to show them some better bars or attractions they won’t find on Expedia. It's a great way to meet women near you while also having a great day at a common tourist spot.
For women who like older men, they’re already going to notice you early. Find a reason to start chatting to them and see where the night takes you.
4) Coffee shops
It’s not unusual to hang out at your local coffee shop. Whether you bring a laptop to get some work done or just sit chill out with your phone, you won’t look out of place.
It’s become very normal to spend extended time in a coffee shop, meaning you’ll learn to identify the regulars for that cafe. Get to know the staff there and have a conversation with them. If you can build a rapport, it’s a great way to get others involved in a conversation.
This is something that’s worked for me very well over the past 12 months. I moved to a new area, found a great coffee shop and often hang out there while I get some work done. I now know the staff on a first-name basis and often end up chatting with other customers while I wait for my coffee.
This tends to be a very natural way to go about things in this environment. There’s no need for an awkward cold approach. You might even spot signs that she wants you to make a move or at least come closer. Instead, just involve her in your conversation and build that rapport from there.
As an added bonus, you don’t need to make plans to go for coffee -- you’re already there!
5) Hiking trails
This is something I stumbled upon by accident when I moved. I’m near a lot of stunning mountain hiking trails and will take any excuse to get out there.
Most people will spend a good amount of time at the summit taking photos and enjoying the endorphins. My first week of living here I went on a solo hike and was surprised by how many groups of younger women were on the trail.
At the top, I saw one group taking a photo near the cliff. I offered to take the photo for them so everyone could be in it. They heard my accent, asked me where I’m from and we all spent some time up there hanging out. Before they left, they invited me to hang out with them downtown that night.
Just like the dog park, you have an obvious shared interest in what you’re doing, so conversation is simple. Talk about hikes you’ve done recently or what you plan to do in the future. This can lead to hours of chatting and solid rapport with absolutely zero risk or effort. And after a while, you can make your move.
If you’re not a big hiker, that’s absolutely fine too. If you start chatting to a younger woman with a passion for hiking, she’ll be excited to tell you all about it. Fun fitness in the sunshine and a great way to meet fit young women, what more do you want?
6) Wine or whiskey tasting events
Most younger women who want to meet guys their age go to clubs. So if you want to pick up women at a club, you'll likely stick out since you're an older guy. Instead, wine tastings are where you'll fit in and meet girls.
Whether you’re into these drinks or want to learn more about them, tasting events are a great time. You’re sure to learn something new from the event and it’s a cost-effective way to figure out what works for you.
In terms of meeting women at these events, that makes for easy conversation. A simple, “What did you think of [drink name]?” is all you need to get things started.
Just like you, the fact she’s there suggests she either enjoys that type of drink or wants to learn about it. Since alcohol taste is mostly subjective, asking her opinion is an engaging and low-key way to get chatting. Or quickly brush up on your wine knowledge and impress her.
If she seems into it, invite her out for another drink or two nearby. You’ve already had a few ounces, what’s another couple of drinks, right?
7) Local sporting events
If you enjoy watching sports, I’d suggest checking out some of the local games in your area. Either free or very cheap, they offer a great atmosphere and attract a varied crowd.
You won’t look or feel out of place here and you’re going to find a lot of younger women watching the game too.
If you need an easy way to strike up a conversation, find some women who seem to know what’s going on. Tell them you’ve been meaning to come watch a game for a while and this is the first time you’ve made it down.
It’s a simple and genuine way to open the conversation and if they’re really into the sport, they’ll be happy to tell you all about it.
Crowds at these local sporting events tend to be very social and welcoming of newcomers. The worst case scenario here is that you get to watch the game -- there are worse ways to spend a few hours.