Are you fed up of constantly dating women that aren’t right for you? Perhaps you’re frustrated that you’re barely dating any women at all!? Most single guys suffer from one or both of these problems for most of their lives. They end up thinking, “why aren’t there any single women near me?”
Many will even marry women who aren’t right for them because they end up believing that this unsuitable woman is the best they can get. No wonder the U.S divorce rate is just a shade under 50%.
These problems often occur because men are looking in the wrong places for single women to date.
The places that men most commonly look for dates are ineffective, either because there aren’t enough single women in these places -- or at least there aren’t enough single women who want to date them.
Below, we’ll explore the situations in which Americans most commonly meet their spouses. We’ll also explain why these are actually highly likely to lead to failed relationships or failed marriages.
Then, we’ll take a look at some alternative places to meet lots of single women who actually want to date you.
So, if you’re constantly wondering “Where can I meet single women near me?” all you need to do is read on.
These figures are based on a 2019 survey issued by wedding planning service The Knot. In this survey, more than 10,000 engaged or recently-married U.S couples were asked how they met. (We’ll call them all “married” for the sake of brevity).
Below, we’ll look at the top four most popular ways these couples meet and why they’re all actually unlikely to lead to lasting happiness.
More than one in five (22%) of married couples are meeting through dating apps. This figure has been increasing steadily since 2015. This makes sense since it was the launch of Tinder in 2012 that made online dating popular among the masses. Before then, it was only seen as a pastime for nerds and introverts.
As of 2020, there are an estimated 43 million Tinder users in the United States and millions more using the copycat apps which emerged following its success. No wonder so many people are finding a spouse this way.
The problem is: your online dating success is heavily based on the quality of your images. Most of the PR teams from the major dating apps have said it themselves. And this might explain the data suggesting that only attractive men are meeting great women online.
This study suggests that the top of 78% of women (in terms of attractiveness) would only consider dating the top 20% of men. This one suggests that women regard 80% of male profiles as “below average”.
A reasonable explanation for this is that beautiful women can afford to be picky because they receive so much male attention on social media and online dating apps. Meanwhile, every male outside the top 20% is likely to be unsatisfied with the attention they’re getting.
As such, it’s fair to suggest that online dating isn’t the best way for all men to meet single women. However, it's one of the most common places where women make the first move. That's mostly thanks to sites like Bumble that actually encourage this.
There are a couple of sites that have been the best options for guys over the past couple of years depending on what you're looking for:
Most people have heard of eHarmony but not enough guys have tried it. They have a huge userbase of women and the best way of matching guys to compatible women that we've found.
What really sets it apart though is that the women who use eHarmony are a lot more motived than other apps and sites. They are way more willing to respond to messages and meet up.
Any guy who hasn't given their free trial a shot needs to do it.
Most guys have tried Tinder but few have had great success using it. When you just want some fun in bed without the commitment we've seen the best results using AFF (which you can also try for free).
They have the biggest user base out there which means more options and a better chance of success. They also have a much wider age range of women using it (not just 18-25 like Tinder) so if you're interested in women, not just girls, AFF is where it's at.
Check them out for free and see what we mean. The site doesn't have the slickest design but it's popular with women who actually want to meet up.
Meeting a partner through friends is a safe option for both men and women. It’s particularly appealing for women who tend to worry more about the possibility of dating someone who turns out to be creepy or dangerous. It's also where guys who want to meet younger women often find success.
On the surface, it’s a win-win. A guy is essentially given the seal of approval when he is introduced to a woman by one of her friends. It means she’s more likely to feel comfortable getting to know him. And he (hopefully) doesn’t have to worry about the embarrassing prospect of being instantly rejected. This initial boost in comfort would explain why 19% of Americans are meeting their spouse this way.
However, the problem with relying exclusively on this strategy is: your circle of friends is likely to be too small. Unless you’re some sort of local celebrity, there’s only likely to be a handful of attractive women in your friendship group - and even less of them who are single.
Even if they’re all introducing you to all of their attractive single friends, you could still run out of options pretty quickly.
These go together because they’re similar environments with similar pros and cons for meeting a woman.
The forced daily proximity helps men and women feel comfortable getting to know each other. It's the same as it does when they are introduced by friends. That's why it's so easy to meet women in college!
However, the problem of a small dating pool also applies here, especially if a man is only choosing to speak to women with whom he shares educational or professional projects.
When a man isn’t meeting enough potentially suitable women, it’s likely he’s also not going on enough dates nor sleeping with enough women to satisfy him. He’ll often become frustrated and miserable in this situation. He might go out to try and pick up women at the club, only to meet the same women there.
Then, when a single woman does come along, he’ll often act clingy, weird and desperate, and mess it up. He'll make the first move too soon and end up driving her away. The longer this lasts, the worse it gets. It’s a vicious circle.
That’s why when he finds a woman who actually does like him, he often won’t think twice about settling for her, even if she’s far from ideal for him. A woman’s biological clock will often cause her to also settle for far-from-ideal spouses.
It’s hard to prove this. But I would suggest this is a huge reason why the divorce rate in America is so high.
Well, the answer is EVERYWHERE. It actually doesn’t matter where you’re meeting women, only that you’re meeting enough. So it’s important not to rely on a specific source, especially those that force you to wait weeks or months before a new woman arrives.
I would urge all men to learn how to effectively approach a woman he’s never met, make her feel comfortable, make her think he’s interesting and most importantly make her think he’s attractive.
Approaching women is a skill that you can learn and improve.
Yes, women are attracted to looks. But they also love a man who is confident, funny, charismatic, assertive, socially acute, intelligent and FUN. If you can learn to develop these qualities in abundance and show them off, you’ll have plenty of women falling over themselves to date you.
Once you do, the problem of a small dating pool will be a thing of the past. It’ll be possible for you to approach women wherever you see them.
Below are some suggestions for the best places to meet women once you’ve got these skills down.
The Knot’s survey suggested that bars and nightclubs were the fifth most common place to meet your spouse. Some 11% of married couples met at a party environment like this.
It’s a good place for a man to meet single women. That's because he’ll find so many of them partying and enjoying themselves out on the town. What’s more, thanks to a bit of alcohol, these women are typically a lot more open to meeting new people.
If you can be that well-presented, charismatic, fun and sociable guy out in the most popular bars and clubs, single women will be excited to hang and party with you. As such, it’ll surely only be a matter of time until you find someone truly compatible with you.
If you have similar hobbies and interests to your partner, that’ll go a long way to helping you enjoy a happy long-term relationship together.
With that in mind, you’d be crazy to not strike up conversations with women when you’re out enjoying your hobbies and interests.
Maybe you attend a weekly salsa lesson, language exchange or yoga class? Perhaps you’re always at the gym or attending live music gigs?
Well, the chances of you hitting it off with women in these places are pretty high! So, stop keeping yourself to yourself and waiting for a chance encounter to “just happen.” Go and introduce yourself.
If you see a woman waiting for a bus, shopping at the mall or enjoying a caramel Frappuccino in Starbucks, go and say hi! This might seem a bit unorthodox, but that’s exactly why it’s a good idea. If you're wondering if she wants you to make a move, just go for it!
These days, so few men have the bravery or the social acuity to approach a woman in situations like this -- even though they would really love to!
So, if you can demonstrate these qualities by smoothly starting a conversation with her while you’re out and about, it’ll do a lot to make you stand out above the hundreds of dudes relying on dating apps or getting drunk to talk to her.
The more you speak to women wherever you meet them, the more comfortable you become doing it. Before long, your pool of potential dates will have grown substantially.
The bigger that pool is, the easier it’ll be to find a partner who is completely right for you.